Dead, ressurected, dead

"My number one philosophy in life is this: God before parents, parents before family (this means siblings, relatives, kids, spouse, etc.), family before friends, friends before acquaintances, acquaintances before strangers and strangers before myself. I don't care what you think of it, but that's how I live my life."

I don't believe it. I really don't freaking believe it. I got rejected by a girl because I was "too nice". What kind of reason is that?!

All this while, I thought that girls liked guys that were nice. Man, if what I thought was actually the opposite of what's true... Arrh! I haven't been living life properly! Ha ha, I'm just joking about that. I like the way I am, although it is a bit unsettling that girls will reject me for "being me", so to speak.

Thankfully though, the girl that rejected me wasn't the one, not by a long shot. There's loads of other girls, and like my friend says, "One girl down another 7 billion to go!". Ha ha, yeah, I thought there were more girls too. Ha ha!

Speaking of "the one"... I think I've found her. She really fits and everything. I'm skeptical though, judging by my current failures with the female species. That, and because I'm only 15. I'm not supposed to find "the one" yet. So, yeah. I'm gonna keep an eye out on here, and if I still think that she's "the one" after a period of time (I'm not gonna say when or who, in case I jinx it), I'm gonna go and ask her out.

Yes, me, ask her out. You can stop laughing now.

God, I'm addicted to this song, especially since it fits my love life exactly. Of course, I'm not going to put in the song's title or singer in here, since I know my cousins read this. Ha ha, you gotta blame them, not me.

Is it "wedding season" right now? There's suddenly so many weddings. My neighbours had weddings yesterday, and it was creepy to see a lot of people getting married at around the same time. Not only that, but my cousin, (a serial dater, by the way) got married last week. My cousin Luqman and I had to be the "security guards" for the wedding (No, really. We had to hold these spears and stand next to the bride and groom and be their guards) and it was fun. The adults couldn't make up their minds though, on what our facial expression should be. When we smiled, they scolded us. When we looked serious, they made fun of us. Nice, real nice.

The wedding was held on the Saturday after my PMR trials, (to those that don't know, PMR is Malaysia's equivalent to Britain's O levels. Or something like that) which was really convenient for me. Don't get me started on the trials. It was freaking hard! Okay, so maybe I'm over exaggerating the exams a bit, but I'm not kidding for the Geography and Life Studies papers. I got a "C" for Geography (honestly, I'm quite glad that I passed. Yes, it was that difficult) and the highest mark was 82%. Fortunately it was a guy. Go men! Ha ha, sorry, bias moment. Heh.

I'm not sure about the other papers, but I'm kinda confident that I'll be able to ace Math. Ha ha, I always ace Math, so that kinda goes without saying. (I'm not bragging, merely being honest. I'm kinda gifted at Math for some reason, so I ace it every time) I'm not too worried about my Islamic Studies, but I'm a nervous wreck for Life Studies and History. I don't know why, but I just feel un-confident about it. Yes, I know "un-confident" isn't a word. Yet. I just made it up. Sue me.

Arrrrh!!!! I don't know why my parents suddenly want to go on outings with all of us these past two days. Sure, I like hanging out with my parents and all (no sarcasm here; I really mean it), but I wanted to go to Random Alphabets' RWP (Read while Waiting Project), where everyone that joins (most of them Random Agents - I'm one of them, for your information) is trying to promote reading. It's a good cause, and I love doing anything that RA's leader Zain H.D. can think of. His plans are always fun, and they always have a good message of some kind.

Unfortunately, I couldn't go. It was being held simultaneously with other cities like Melbourne, Brisbane, Sydney, Singapore to name a few. To those that went, tell me what happened! Was it successful? Has reading been promoted at all? I need to know!!!

Anyways, I went and watched a few movies with my family, and the movie we first wanted to watch was "Don't Mess With The Zohan". That was one of our biggest mistakes ever. There was so many perverted and dirty scenes in it that I'm shocked that it's rated "U"! We blamed Dad for the choice, because he chose that movie. Ha ha, yeah. The next day, (which was yesterday) we watched "Wall-E". To those that haven't watched it yet, I highly recommend it! Wait, lemme just emphasize it a bit more. I highly recommend watching it!

I watched it twice and I loved it both times. Once was with my cousin, which was earlier in the week and the other time was with my family yesterday. Both times, I laughed and cried (yes, I cried. Just because I'm a guy doesn't mean that I'm devoid of any feelings. And just 'cause I cried doesn't mean that I'm a wuss, a sensitive romantic or a homosexual!) at all the same times. 8.5 over 10 (it's not 9.5 because the opening was kinda... Slow, to be honest). Zohan gets 5, but only because I'm in a good mood right now.

School's gonna start tomorrow. I'm not sure whether to be anxious, worried or relieved. So I'm gonna be all three. On the one hand, I'll finally be able to meet my friends again, I'm gonna get my exam papers and see how badly (or, if a miracle happens, good) I did, and I'll be able to see the girl I think is "the one" plus I get to finally do something, instead of stay at home doing nothing but watch TV and... *Shudder* Study. On the other hand... It's school. You can see my obvious dilemma on what emotion to be feeling, don't you?

Right, then. This will probably be my last blog post until about 18th of October. The reason being my PMR is coming soon, and I have to study an extra extra amount. Yes, the extra was doubled on purpose for emphasis. *Sigh* I'm gonna miss blogging. And reading people's blog. And annoying people in cyberspace until they log out. Good times, good times... Ha ha, I guess I'm going to end this post now. It's getting a wee bit too long.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Here's a post for people who want to understand Islam accurately:

Ten Things People Should Know About Islam

P.P.S. Luqman, I want my pencil case back!

Something unbreakable was almost broken

"Don't listen to what other people say. Sing your own song, dance to your own beat, say your own lines and laugh at your own jokes. Live life your way, so don't take this advice just because I told you to."

Not asking her out is turns out to actually be a really good idea. Oh, right, you don't know about it.

Well, when I was in Standard 3 (or 4, the details are sketchy), I made a vow to myself to not date anyone unless I found the one. The reason? I want her to be my real and true soulmate. Not just some girl that I'd probably breakup with after a few months, weeks, days, dates and etc. Until now, I don't think I've really found her yet, so if I asked her, my vow would be broken.

Which is why it's a good thing I changed my mind. Now you're probably wondering how I'd know who the one is? Well, that's easy. She'd make me feel different than if I was with anyone else. I'd do things that are degrading and humiliating (because if she really IS the one, she wouldn't make me do anything like that), and I wouldn't even have to know her to feel that "chemistry" that you only get with really close friends.

Though, my cousins and parents are skeptical about this. They have this really weird idea that I can only find the one after dating a lot of girls. That way I could quote my Mum, "know what I like and what I don't like", unquote. Yes, that's why she wanted to set me up on a blind date.

Seriously, though, I'm interested to know how the one will look like. Another sure sign is that my family and friends will love her. Also, we'd be total opposites yet have everything in common. Aaah, it's hard to explain that one, really actually. Plus, I'll just know.

Alright, enough about that. I have to mention that I won't be posting this weekend (which is why I'm posting today. I'm supposed to be redoing my stupid History Folio (for some reason, I got it back twice while everyone in my class only got it back once - how is that fair?!).

I'll be at a camp this weekend, and I'm really reluctant to go. It's not because it's an Islamic camp - that's the aspect that I'm interested in - no, it's just that I don't like camps. Don't ask why, I just don't. It's not because I had a bad camping experience when I was younger (I didn't) or because I don't know how to camp (look, I may be a city boy, but I act like a village kid; I just prefer technology. Ha ha). It's just that... Actually, I don't have any actual reason why. At least my consolation is that I won't have to go to school this Saturday. We're having extra classes. I don't have anything against learning, but school doesn't let me go to my full potential. Besides, when are we ever going to need to know certain things such as how to find the hypotenuse of a right angled triangle?!

Wow, what started as a "It's a good reason I'm not going to date" post is quickly becoming my regular ramblings. Meh, must be my natural instinct to write. Ha ha! Nah, I was just joking about that. Unlike what people think, I don't brag (except to brag about me not bragging. But that's a different whole 'nother story)

To everyone reading, I need to ask. In this aspect, am I normal? No, not the "bragging" thing. It's just that, when it comes to music, I prefer songs from the old days. Songs by ABBA, Air Supply, Westlife, Dawn, to name a few. Songs such as "Super Trouper", "Every Woman In The World To Me", "Fool Again", "Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Ole Oak Tree" and etc. At 15 years of age. As a teenager, is that normal? Because except for certain songs and bands, the ones with great lyrics or exceptional music respectively, I'd rather listen to these "Oldies", as my generation puts it.

To be frank, music nowadays are going downhill. There's more style than substance. Except for those especially nice ones, the ones with deep meanings like OneRepublic's "Apologize" (to those of you that don't know, it's by OneRepublic, not Timbaland. Timbaland ruined it when he remixed it), about a guy that no longer will accept his girlfriend's apologies anymore. Or emotionally meaningful ones like Sum 41's "Address This Letter (Dear Father)", which is about a guy whose Dad left him when he was a kid, and he wants to tell his Dad that he (the guy) wishes he (the Dad) never left, but he's being just fine without his Dad.

Yes, my generation has lost the true meaning of quality music. How can people listen to eardrum damaging songs that not only not make sense, but if they do make sense, it's about something totally irrelevant to life.

Wanna know what I hate about my "peers"? They think that music by groups and/or bands like the ones stated above are "mushy love songs". Yes, they're love songs. Yes, sometimes they're mushy. But have you actually took the time to actually listen to them? Try listening to Dawn featuring Tony Orlando's "Tie A Yellow Ribbon Round The Ole Oak Tree". It's about a guy, who, after three years of being in prison, sends a letter to his lover that if she still loves him, she must tie a yellow ribbon round the ole oak tree. If she doesn't, he'll take the hint and leave, as well as take the blame. When he sees the tree, however, he sees one thousand yellow ribbons! The song is about true love. If you don't like that concept, then you're nothing but a cynical being. Not worth being called a human.

Or how about Air Supply's "Every Woman In The World"? I want you guys and girls to actually listen to that song. And actually listen to the lyrics. If you can honestly say that it was the worst piece of merde that you've ever heard (mind my French), then, well, you honestly don't deserve my attention nor respect. I'm not saying I'm better than you, but I am saying that I don't want to waste time on people like this.

Oh my God, French is so freaking hard to learn! But man, once you know how to say certain things, it feels really good. So now I'm going to change my endings. I won't be using "Till next time" anymore. I'm just letting you know. Alright, I've gotta go now. Homework and all.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Aboo, my pet monkey, got interviewed by the school newspeople. More on that next time.

One hectic week... OR Dating blind

"Blind dating isn't only for the blind. After all, love itself is blind."

First of all, let me apologize for not being able to blog. Not only was I very busy, but it has been a really crazy and hectic week for me. Don't forget to add that I can only use the computer in the weekends.

Right. You're probably wondering why it's been so hectic.

Well, let's just put it this way. My Mum suddenly wants me to have a girlfriend, and she's actually forcing me to date. Of course, I refused. What kind of person in their right minds want to have a girlfriend (or boyfriend, if you're a girl) without actually liking the person? I'll only date a girl if I really really like her. You know, there is this girl I'm planning on asking out (yep, a Sharrif first!) but I'm chickening out. I've never done this kinda thing before, you know, so I'm shaking like a rattlesnake's tail.

My plan is to ask her out on Valentine's Day, but I still have no better way to do it other than by saying, "Hey, um... Will you, uh, be my Valentine?" Yeah, reall smooth. Not to mention cliché as well. Meh. What'll happen, will happen, and what won't, won't. We'll just see.

Anyways, back to my actual topic. She said that if I didn't have a girlfriend by next year, I'd be set up on a blind date. Finally, on Friday, I decided to negotiate with my Mum. Finally, she caved. She won't set me up on a blind date until I'm 21 or 25. I can't remember which. Either way, I still have a lot of time to find a girl willing enough to date me. *Clears throat* Any girl interested out there? *Winks "flirtatiously"*

Haha., okay, enough of that. Now I'm pretty sure you're thinking, "How is being forced to go on a date enough to make it a hectic week?". You're not...? Meh, I'm still going to tell you what else happened.

You know how school is boring? Don't be afraid to admit it. You hate school, don't you? Be it the strict dress code, dumb rules or evil sadistic teachers, there's always something to hate about school. Hey, don't get it wrong here. I actually love learning. It's just that I hate waking up to go to school. I'd rather stay at home and learn there, like through unschooling. Or going through homeschooling things like tuition. Which is why I decided to start a student revolution. Taking tips from "School-survival.net", me and my friends are starting a revolution!

We need at least 200 people to join us. So far, we only have about 20. I kinda forgot to recruit more people, ha ha. So if you're interested, give me a call. I'm at 3 Gigih. Ask for Sharrif. Remember, we don't promote violence. Only change. Note: I'm only searching for recruits in my school, which is SMKS 9.

Alright, I'm getting sleepy.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I got back my RuneScape account! Finally! For those that want to add me, my username is Josh_Carter4.

No more imitation - At least, not from you.

"Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but not so when the imitation is an insult."

Aaaah! Dang it! I am so seriously angry right now. Funny how the only two emotions I truly feel are happiness and anger. Especially anger. Which I'm feeling right now. Can you please remind me to control my urges, at least for now?

I'm totally losing it.

The urge is taking over me bit by bit. Man, I really gotta learn how Dexter can plan every detail properly and precisely. Maybe then I can actually live with this... This thing inside of me.

Anyways, let's get back to topic. A few girls in my class had this English presentation, and what was it they did? They did a role play that included them playing as four guys, and - guess what? - they totally degraded, humiliated and insulted us. They didn't even ask us for permission, let alone do it even a bit right.

Razin is a good artist, and wanna what they made "him" do? They made him show off his art. He never shows off his art, ever. Heck, most of the time we have to make him show us his latest drawing. Unless we asked him to draw something for us. That's a whole different story. I'm going to be honest here. When it comes to his drawings, Razin is a wee bit too humble than he should be. That's a good thing, I guess.

Faiz had muscles and works out. He doesn't need to show off, although he does show off at times, but usually when it's one of those "macho" acts. You know how it is, right, guys? Most of you guys think it's macho sometimes to show off your biceps (I don't understand it, though). They ended up making "him" do show off stuff out of the blue. Apparently they think that all boys like showing off whatever asset that they might have (like Razin's drawings and Faiz's... Erm... Brawn?)

Aizat was hit the worst. He is known as a loner to most of the classmates and he's usually seen with his eyes like slits. Like, Brock, from Pokemon, if you've ever watched it. But he never says the word stupid, he only has his eyes like that when he's bored or being teased, and he only disses the teacher if he was unfairly scolded. Like, when he finishes his work, did it the best he could, and then the teacher scold him for not doing it nicely. Stuff like that. Well, let's just say, they went and made "him" do everything opposite of that. "He" was having his eyes in every scenario, "he" was dissing the teacher when "he" was scolded correctly (this meaning that he really didn't do something, and was thus scolded) and "he" was using the words "stupid" a lot. So out of character.

I don't think mine was so bad, but I was insulted on personal things. Like, I use "Joshster" a lot because it's a connection of "Josh Carter", and "Joshster" sounded nicer than "Joshter". (Oh, I forgot to mention; they were putting these names around their necks, like a necklace. It was "us" with minor changes: Razin became Razif. Bros became Berush (that's Faiz's nickname - don't ask). Makoto became Sakoto (Aizat's Japanese name) and mine was just Joshster.)

Another one, when I say something, I only repeat it because I don't think people are listening. "I" was repeating it like "I" was some broken parrot that forgot to stop repeating a phrase! Then they did the biggest insult of all my non-mental illness rituals. They made "me" do the "camera motion" with "my" hands! (You know, the one where the right hand is going in a circular motion while the left hand is vertical, like holding a box) I only do that to remember specific memories! Whenever I do that, it's like a video saved into my memories. I never forget them. I just have to recall doing that, and I can remember. So it was the ultimate insult to me.

They didn't apologize to Aizat, their apology to me was totally insincere, but at least Faiz and Razon got good and proper apologies. Lucky guys. I think I'm done ranting, and now I'm going to just ramble on.

School was interesting today, for only one reason. My stomach wouldn't let me forget that I was supposed to be in pain. It got annoying after a while, especially when I lost my ability to stand a couple of times. Not to mention it started hurting while I was sitting down in class. I can't even sneeze, cough or yawn without pain. The coolest part was that no one noticed that I was in pain. Other than Amalina. She even criticized me for coming to school - I'm not really healthy enough to come to school but I insisted to my parents to let me come. Yeah, yeah, for now, I'm a nerd. I'm just going to study, then I'll watch TV, play games and be irresponsible nonstop!

Alright, I guess that's all I want to rant about. One last thing though. To Anis, Zulaikha, Maisarah and Sofea, what you did today was rude, belittling and mean. My nature is naturally forgiving, but I'm not going to be able to trust you girls. Ever.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

We did it!!!

"Nothing feels better than having something accomplished, especially if it was in a group."

I can't believe it. We seriously did it. Plus, I'm on TV! Can life get any better, cooler and more exciting? This is totally the best of my life so far. Aaah...

You have completely no idea what I'm talking about, do you?

Well, recently, we Malaysians did a Big Freeze. You know, like the one that's happening all over the world? Yeah. It was great! I might even say awesome!

Except, of course, the part where it started 5 minutes too early. So we ended up doing it for 10 minutes instead of 5. Imagine freezing on the stairs, one foot up, balancing dangerously, for five freaking minutes! I really thought I was going to fall, haha. Good thing I didn't, eh?

I even got to be on TV! Why? Because since I was one of the youngest there, they interviewed me. Not only me, actually, but my buddy Shane as well. If you wanna see, go to YouTube and look for "KL Big Freeze Pavillion". It'll be somewhere there.

Okay, I gotta go now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

ImprovEverywhere

"Nothing is more fulfilling than joining a cause of some kind. Especially if the cause if for humour."


View my page on Improv Everywhere Global


Join it. You won't regret it.