A Guy's Point Of View

"Everything has two sides to a story. Good and evil; Sweet and bitter; Love and hate; Innocent and guilty; Boys and girls."

(NOTE: This has been edited, and is not mine in the first place. In fact, after this bracket, it's all part of an edit until the end)

Girls, you may agree to this, but when it actually happens, 96% of girls don't realize it until it's too late and the guy who did it is so frustrated that he has moved on to someone who will take notice and appreciate him.

From a guy's point of view:

We don't care if you talk to other guys. We don't care if you're friends with other guys. But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off. It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.

We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 AM in the morning, we do get a little concerned. Nothing is that important at 2 AM that it can't wait till the next morning.

When we tell you that you're pretty, beautiful, gorgeous, cute, stunning or anything similar to that, we freaking mean it. Don't tell us we're wrong, because we'll just stop trying to convince you.

One of the sexiest thing about a girl is her self confidence. (Yeah, you can quote me on that) Don't be mad when we hold the door for you. We're not being chauvinists that think you're too weak to open the door. We're trying to be a gentleman. Take advantage of the mood that we're in.

If we give you an expensive gift, don't feel guilty about it. We saved and/or worked hard to get it, and to us, you deserve it. If we got you a present that you don't like, tell us, but don't tell us in such a harsh way. There is a thing called "tact", you know. Whenever we give you gifts for no apparent reason, don't think that we're only giving it to you because we're in trouble. We do it because we love you.

Let us pay for you! Don't "feel bad" about it. We not only enjoy doing it, but it's what we expect to do. Just smile and say, "thank you."

Kiss us when no one is watching. But if you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be even more impressed.

You don't have to get dressed up for us! If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't need to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every makeup that you own. We like you for who you are and not what you are. Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her PJ's, or when she's wearing one of my T-shirts and boxers, compared to when she's all dolled up.

Don't take everything we say seriously. Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. Try to see the beauty in it.

Don't get angry easily. We never mean to hurt you. Don't be so quick to get jealous, either. Let us talk and be friends with other girls. You don't have anything to worry about. After all, we chose you.

Stop using magazines and the media as your bible. Please don't talk about "how hot Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise or Jesse McCartney is" in front of us. Frankly, we don't care. You have girlfriends for that kind of stuff.

Whatever happened to the word "handsome"?

And girls, we can not stress this enough: If you aren't being treated right by a guy, don't wait for him to change. Ditch him, because he probably won't. Sorry, but guys like that are a disgrace to the male population. He's an a*s and you should find someone who will treat you with utter respect.

Someone who will honour your morals. Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest. Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes. Someone who will love you no matter how bad you make them feel, or what you do to them. Someone who will stop whatever they're doing just to look you in the eyes and say...

"I love you."

And actually mean it.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. To those that know the original, they'll know what I've added, erased, modified and fixed. Whether I've made it better or worse is debatable. I'm pretty sure that most - if not all - guys (those that aren't jerks, anyway) will agree with this. So girls, please, look at our point of view.

God, it's been a while...

"One thing that I don't understand about exams is this: Why is our future, our entire life, determined by a single piece of paper, your memory and how well you were that day?"

To be honest, I had actually planned to post in October, but one thing led to another, and now it's November. Price of procrastination, I guess. I did plan to write the personalities (as how I see it) of each of my classmates, as well as a random amount of friends not from my class. Oh well. Guess that'll have to wait.

Anyways, since I'm typing stuff now, I'm not gonna go into detail about my life at the moment (probably not, though. For all I know, I might get so used to blogging again that I'll start spilling all of my secrets. Again), so I'll just mention a dream that I had recently.

It was a really weird dream, but even though I had it a few nights ago, I can still remember it quite vividly. It started out normal enough.

Wait, scratch that. It was weird from the beginning. I remember it started with me going into a room, which was like a party theme going on (note here: not the teen party where people dance around like uncontrolled monkeys, but the kind of party where adults go to and... Talk. Not much of a party, really) and one of my best friends were there. I saw Danny and his family were there, and we were started catching up, chatting, basically having a great time from just talking. God, I miss him. That dream just made me realize how much.

After the talking, and a few feeble attempts at getting him to sleep over so that we could have more fun together, I decided to walk out of the place. As soon as I left the room, the dream seemed to skip to the future a bit, and it was suddenly 2009, and we were back in school. The way the dream moved on, it was kinda like how the movies do it, skipping loads of time effortlessly. (You know what I'm talking about)

I went into a classroom, and it was March. The classroom was one of my junior's class, and they were all talking together and hanging out in that room. In the dream, it was 3 girl's birthdays on that month, so the juniors were planning something for them. I just happened to be there, so I sat down and paid attention. People seemed to talk more to others, instead of to me. It was as if I wasn't there at all. Whenever I tried talking to some of the other juniors, they just ignored me point blank, without even glancing my way or acknowledging my existence. Even though I now know that it was a dream, it still hurt.

One thing was off about the planning of the party, though, and even though I noticed it in the dream, for some reason I didn't realize anything was amiss. Odd, no? Anyways, the thing that was off was the fact that junior I had my eye on (I'm not going to elaborate more, at least, not yet) had her birthday on in March, but her name wasn't in the list of the three girls that had their birthdays then.

I even remember saying (in the dream) "Hey, why isn't ******'s birthday in this list?" but for some reason, it was shrugged off. Then I all I remember was seeing her (for some reason, really close to my face, until I could see every flaw and perfection) organizing everything. In fact, there were only 5 juniors that I can recall, and 3 of them didn't mean that much to me, which was really quite interesting, in retrospect.

After that, it was suddenly at least one month ahead, and me and a couple of other prefects (again, juniors) were playing a water balloon war. I don't remember what happened during that at all, except that for some reason, no one got wet (other than the palm of our hands from holding the somewhat leaking water balloons)

So, that's it. My dream, finally written - or, typed, at least - into some sort of medium. Interpret it anyway you like. I don't mind. I've got my own interpretations, but the human mind is way too complicated for just one mere person to try to interpret and understand. Feel free to leave any interpretation(s) in the comment box.

Once again, sorry for taking up your time, thank you for reading my blog, and have a nice day.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I guess this makes it official that my blog is no longer in a coma.

Dead, ressurected, dead

"My number one philosophy in life is this: God before parents, parents before family (this means siblings, relatives, kids, spouse, etc.), family before friends, friends before acquaintances, acquaintances before strangers and strangers before myself. I don't care what you think of it, but that's how I live my life."

I don't believe it. I really don't freaking believe it. I got rejected by a girl because I was "too nice". What kind of reason is that?!

All this while, I thought that girls liked guys that were nice. Man, if what I thought was actually the opposite of what's true... Arrh! I haven't been living life properly! Ha ha, I'm just joking about that. I like the way I am, although it is a bit unsettling that girls will reject me for "being me", so to speak.

Thankfully though, the girl that rejected me wasn't the one, not by a long shot. There's loads of other girls, and like my friend says, "One girl down another 7 billion to go!". Ha ha, yeah, I thought there were more girls too. Ha ha!

Speaking of "the one"... I think I've found her. She really fits and everything. I'm skeptical though, judging by my current failures with the female species. That, and because I'm only 15. I'm not supposed to find "the one" yet. So, yeah. I'm gonna keep an eye out on here, and if I still think that she's "the one" after a period of time (I'm not gonna say when or who, in case I jinx it), I'm gonna go and ask her out.

Yes, me, ask her out. You can stop laughing now.

God, I'm addicted to this song, especially since it fits my love life exactly. Of course, I'm not going to put in the song's title or singer in here, since I know my cousins read this. Ha ha, you gotta blame them, not me.

Is it "wedding season" right now? There's suddenly so many weddings. My neighbours had weddings yesterday, and it was creepy to see a lot of people getting married at around the same time. Not only that, but my cousin, (a serial dater, by the way) got married last week. My cousin Luqman and I had to be the "security guards" for the wedding (No, really. We had to hold these spears and stand next to the bride and groom and be their guards) and it was fun. The adults couldn't make up their minds though, on what our facial expression should be. When we smiled, they scolded us. When we looked serious, they made fun of us. Nice, real nice.

The wedding was held on the Saturday after my PMR trials, (to those that don't know, PMR is Malaysia's equivalent to Britain's O levels. Or something like that) which was really convenient for me. Don't get me started on the trials. It was freaking hard! Okay, so maybe I'm over exaggerating the exams a bit, but I'm not kidding for the Geography and Life Studies papers. I got a "C" for Geography (honestly, I'm quite glad that I passed. Yes, it was that difficult) and the highest mark was 82%. Fortunately it was a guy. Go men! Ha ha, sorry, bias moment. Heh.

I'm not sure about the other papers, but I'm kinda confident that I'll be able to ace Math. Ha ha, I always ace Math, so that kinda goes without saying. (I'm not bragging, merely being honest. I'm kinda gifted at Math for some reason, so I ace it every time) I'm not too worried about my Islamic Studies, but I'm a nervous wreck for Life Studies and History. I don't know why, but I just feel un-confident about it. Yes, I know "un-confident" isn't a word. Yet. I just made it up. Sue me.

Arrrrh!!!! I don't know why my parents suddenly want to go on outings with all of us these past two days. Sure, I like hanging out with my parents and all (no sarcasm here; I really mean it), but I wanted to go to Random Alphabets' RWP (Read while Waiting Project), where everyone that joins (most of them Random Agents - I'm one of them, for your information) is trying to promote reading. It's a good cause, and I love doing anything that RA's leader Zain H.D. can think of. His plans are always fun, and they always have a good message of some kind.

Unfortunately, I couldn't go. It was being held simultaneously with other cities like Melbourne, Brisbane, Sydney, Singapore to name a few. To those that went, tell me what happened! Was it successful? Has reading been promoted at all? I need to know!!!

Anyways, I went and watched a few movies with my family, and the movie we first wanted to watch was "Don't Mess With The Zohan". That was one of our biggest mistakes ever. There was so many perverted and dirty scenes in it that I'm shocked that it's rated "U"! We blamed Dad for the choice, because he chose that movie. Ha ha, yeah. The next day, (which was yesterday) we watched "Wall-E". To those that haven't watched it yet, I highly recommend it! Wait, lemme just emphasize it a bit more. I highly recommend watching it!

I watched it twice and I loved it both times. Once was with my cousin, which was earlier in the week and the other time was with my family yesterday. Both times, I laughed and cried (yes, I cried. Just because I'm a guy doesn't mean that I'm devoid of any feelings. And just 'cause I cried doesn't mean that I'm a wuss, a sensitive romantic or a homosexual!) at all the same times. 8.5 over 10 (it's not 9.5 because the opening was kinda... Slow, to be honest). Zohan gets 5, but only because I'm in a good mood right now.

School's gonna start tomorrow. I'm not sure whether to be anxious, worried or relieved. So I'm gonna be all three. On the one hand, I'll finally be able to meet my friends again, I'm gonna get my exam papers and see how badly (or, if a miracle happens, good) I did, and I'll be able to see the girl I think is "the one" plus I get to finally do something, instead of stay at home doing nothing but watch TV and... *Shudder* Study. On the other hand... It's school. You can see my obvious dilemma on what emotion to be feeling, don't you?

Right, then. This will probably be my last blog post until about 18th of October. The reason being my PMR is coming soon, and I have to study an extra extra amount. Yes, the extra was doubled on purpose for emphasis. *Sigh* I'm gonna miss blogging. And reading people's blog. And annoying people in cyberspace until they log out. Good times, good times... Ha ha, I guess I'm going to end this post now. It's getting a wee bit too long.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Here's a post for people who want to understand Islam accurately:

Ten Things People Should Know About Islam

P.P.S. Luqman, I want my pencil case back!

I'm not going to do it, after all

"Being brave is very easy. Being a coward is even easier. What's really hard, though, is knowing when to be brave and when to be a coward."

Aw, man. I am such a coward! Just dub me, "Most Cowardly Geek Of The Century". Okay, that's kinda an exaggeration, but nonetheless.

Remember when I said that I was going to ask this girl out next year, on Valentine's Day? Well, I'm not going to. The reason is really quite simple. Among everything, I treasure friendship the most. She's one of my closest friends, and I really don't want to ruin our friendship. In any way.

Yeah, when it comes to friends, I don't take risks. I know that friends come and go, but what's the harm in holding on to them as long as possible?

This is probably how it'll end. Me being with a lot of friends, but alone. I'm just one of those guys that girls don't ever have crushes on, let alone like. No, I'm not whining here, just stating a fact. Girls always say to me, "you're such a great friend", "thanks for listening to my problems", and even, "how can girls not like you? You're (insert good adjectives here)!" You know, every single time a girl says that to me, I'm tempted to ask, "Well, then, do you like me?"

Meh, it'd be too awkward, no?

I'm so glad to get that out of my chest. One of my friends told me not to lose hope, and that I still have 7 months until February, and that she might fall for me by then. Yep, the friend that said that is a girl.

If she falls for me, I want her to say that to my face. Don't start by giving excuses such as, "She's too shy!" What the heck?! I've already confessed! Why should she feel any shyness?

Hmm, this is getting a wee bit too love related. But can someone please explain something to me? Is it true that some girls, when they like a guy, they won't admit it, even after he confesses? Some of my friends have told me that so-called "fact" and it doesn't make sense. At all. I need confirmation from you readers out there.

Oh, God, school. You know, I recently did an essay, and we had to "describe" everything. I think I took it a bit too literally, since it's over four pages long. I never want to do another "describing" essay ever again. I mean, seriously. Over four pages?! What's up with that?!

*Sighs* Life is getting too complicated for my taste. Don't take this as suicidal, but I kinda feel like dying sometimes. Oh, no, not because I don't wanna live or anything stupid like that. It's just that... I really want to see what's on the other side. I'm sure that Islam (Note: this is a personal opinion!) is the most accurate religion, but I still just want to see who really got it right. Hey, you never know, right?

The only people I seem to envy are the dead ones. Why? Well, let's just say, I think they're the luckiest people there is. For all we know, there's no longer any more pain; they don't feel anything at all... The only downside to wanting to know is that, to actually know, you have to die first. Don't take it the wrong way. I love being alive, but if I'm going to die, I won't be complaining.

There's this untested theory that when someone is close to their date of death (DOD), they tend to act differently. I'm not sure if that's true, but I haven't been being myself lately. It could be anything, of course, and I'm not choosing any favourites.

Oh, right, I haven't told you guys about my current health. The pain in my head is apparently from my sinus. According to the doctor, there's an infection in my sinus. I've taken some medication, but I won't know for certain whether it works or not until the second week. Which starts today.

Remember this saying: Prepare for the worst, hope for the best.

That's pretty much how I see life. Right, it's 10:23, my Mum and Dad are getting angry at me (I'm not supposed to be online on weekdays), and I just remembered some unfinished homework. If I change my mind and decide to ask her, you'll be updated. Same thing goes if she tells me that she likes me. Both are unlikely, but it'll be noted in here.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Luqman, if you're reading this, if you're bragging and/or emphasizing about how you greeted me "nicely", the purpose is gone. Oh, and happy belated birthday (again)!

Hot off the newspaper!

"News is only news if people care. Since all people care about is destruction, mayhem and death, what does that make us? Barbarians?"

I bet you didn't hear about this. I'm pretty sure that you didn't. How do I figure that? Well, it's about my friend's personal life, and he didn't seem to mind about me putting it in here (meaning, he didn't object), so here it will be put. For all time.

Or, until I decide to get rid of it. Which would be never.

Anyways, on to the story. My classmate, Aizat, and another classmate, Jennifer (not her real name), are apparently dating! Now, not only was that really shocking (Aizat is kinda... Well, the type of guy girls aren't into. Unless girls are into dark, gothic, depressed, dark-minded, dirty-minded and disfunctional weaklings. Which means I'll have to change my entire image. Dang.) but they actually call each other "husband and wife" online!

Well, now I finally have some ammunition against him. Wait until everybody in class reads about this... Which is why I'm depending on you, readers, to popularize my blog. Tell everyone! The world deserves to know! Ha ha, I'm like some sort of tabloid manager newspaper editor. Wait, not newspaper editor. It's closer to "Newspaper boy". You know, the one that's telling everyone what the news is.

I'm kinda worried about the two of them, though. Since they're already "husband and wife", (so to speak) they might decide to do third base. If you know what I mean. To be frank, that's kinda disgusting, doing it at 15 and all. Do people actually do third base at 15? Don't they have some sense of control?

Right, that's enough about the two lovebirds. I'll update as the news comes.

My friend Ming Yi is in a dilema. She's in love with this guy that's trying to choose between her and another girl. But, honestly, I don't see how hard it is to choose. He's in love (at least like, anyway) with Ming Yi, and it's only infatuation with this other girl that doesn't even know him. It's not that hard to choose, mate. Just go with the one you love, not the one you infatuate. Wow, that sounds weird, no?

We're receiving an update about the husband and wife thing!

Apparently, Aizat has more than one wife! Before I lecture him, I have to ask. How the heck is he the type of guy that attracts girls!? Now for the lecture. Aizat! How could you cheat on your wife?! That's despicable! It's low! It's crude! And it's amazing. (Hah, you weren't expecting that, were you?)

But seriously, though, Aizat, stick to one girl. If you're reading this, I'm telling it to you as a friend. If you have more than one wife, you'll just end up hurting all of them, and you'll probably be slapped a few times. Oh, and don't give me any nonsense about how "Life is too short for just one girl". If you're going to tell me that, you should never have gotten married in the first place!

That's all for now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

New and improved

"I've always wondered about the 'new and improved' saying. How can something new be improved, if it's never been made before?"

You'll never guess what I just got. Go on, guess!

Right. You know, that line will never be understood by me. If I'm just told that I'd never be able to guess it, then why the heck would I waste my time trying in the first place? Am I right or am I right?

Anyways, on to my actual reason for posting. I had my hair cut! It was long and now it's... Not long. It's basically the same as my old hairstyle, only shorter. Um... Yeah, I never knew how pathetic I was until I read that a few times, over and over again. Okay, not really pathetic. But still, you've got to be something to have the same old hairstyle even after a haircut!

I just wanted to add, my headache is still going strong. It's as if it [the pain] has it's own personal mission to hurt me. Fortunately, though, he (yes, I'm calling my pain "he") tends to get tired longer and longer now. It used to hurt all the time, but now, it hurts only painfully in the afternoon until night, and random times in the morning. And loud sounds still make him wake up with a vengeance. Other than those times, though, he's peacefully sleeping, and I'd like to keep him that way.

Oh, right!

Before I forget (or, before my pain wakes up), I need to mention this. I do not have a tumour. (At least, not yet, anyways.) So stop talking about it like I do! I swear, if I get another "Is it true that you have a brain tumour?" like question, I'm going to snap! Anyways, I'm going to have to go for another checkup on Monday (it actually was supposed to be Saturday, but my parents just had to go and leave me and the rest of us here and go off to Jakarta), since there's still pain.

Oh, yes, you read right. My parents aren't home for the weekend. Now, I'm not a party teen, so I'm not whooping with joy. But I'm not down in the dumps, either. At least now I won't have any problems with people coming over. For studying, of course. For once, please try to stop thinking illegal and slash or dirty thoughts.

And now I'm home alone. What about my siblings, you ask? My twin sisters have gone somewhere (they were gone when I woke up, I swear!) and my brother is sleeping over at a cousin's house. My other sister isn't really much company, so yeah, technically, I'm home alone.

It's going to be a looooooooong week. There's nothing to look forward to, to be honest. I only have studying, TV, the computer, and more studying. Not to mention the pain. Never forget the pain.

Ooh, ooh, guess what? I have a long-lost twin that I never knew of! Ha ha, I wish. Actually, I just have this new pen pal (or is it "chat chum"?), and we have so much things in common it's freaky. Her blog's link is there is on my blog, although it's private - sorry, readers, you won't get to read her awesome blog. Your loss.

Man I'm getting bored now. Blogging just isn't what it used to be *Sigh* Although it's cool that random people are reading my blog. How they got this link, I shall never know. After all, it's really complicated to accidentally type the URL. Look at all the dashes in it! Heck, one of my friends typed it wrong, even when I gave him the link. See how complicated it is?

Anyways, I'm going to go now. If I get any inspiration to type more (or, if I just suddenly get an idea for a random blog title) I'll update. Later!

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

Healthy illnesses

"An illness is only an illness if it deteriorates your life in any way. (Be it physically, emotionally or mentally)"

Dang. Illnesses seem to like me a lot this past month lately.

Remember roughly last month, I had my appendix taken out? Now I'm having a throbbing headache. Hopefully, it's only from my glasses lack of power, and isn't anything serious, but the doctor did mention that it could be a tumour. At my eye or brain. *Sigh*

I'm not going to believe him, though. Last time I did, it only turned out to be my appendix. This time it's probably only because of my glasses. But, hey, if it's anything serious, I'll just update and let you all know. And to think. I only got this diagnosis after talking about overdosing my 650 MG painkillers - Connected or coincidence?

This headache hurts more than my stomach. Good news, though. I'm still able from taking too much Uphamol (the painkillers I'm taking) in too short a time. Although I can barely think straight right now. Just going to apologize if what this post is about tends to be... Un-me, if you know what I mean.

I just realized. After two days, and only now do I realize. If it's a tumour, I'll have to go into the hospital! God no! I'm starting to dislike hospitals. I still remember that when I was younger, I practically lived in the hospital because of my many sudden illnesses. I really really really don't want to "live" in the hospital again.

Speaking of hospitals, one of my classmates recently got herself... Wounded, somehow. From how other classmates mentioned it, it seems that she fell down and cut herself so badly, a lot of blood came out. If she's reading it, Sophie, hope you get better soon! Oh, and when you get back to school, I'm going to force you to tell me what happened, so there.

My God the pain is horrible. It's as if my head brain suddenly hates me, and now it wants to get out of my head! You know how that's like, right? Wait, you don't. Unless you do, then yeah, I can't believe you're allowed to go online. (I'm not, actually, but I just felt like posting slash updating this blog)

I had to go home early last Friday. And I missed my tuition. That was so unfair. For all I know, we had a ton of homework, and now I'll be waaay behind everyone else. Meh, life's evil like that, no?

Everything is too loud.

I'm going to finish this post soon, since the keyboard-is-being-typed sound is giving me a bigger headache. I'll update when I either get better, or worse. See ya!

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I think I fell in love with her again. Either that, or I never un-loved her. This is getting complicating.

Overdosage, and etc.

"Is overdose really that bad? Besides death, what other symptoms are there?"

I'm going to do it. I really am.

650 MG is definitely not working for my pain. I'm gonna start doubling the dosage. Just so you know, if I don't post a new post by next month, it means I'm dead.

No, not intentionally. But still dead. (No words will help against this. I'm not suicidal, just in pain)

Anyways... On to cheerier news (did I spell that right? "Cheerier"? Meh, the evil red spelling lines aren't there, so I guess it is). A lot of things have been happening, too much to actually mention specifically. So I'll just do my best, and apologies to any and all unorganized-ness.

I've been in this really weird honest mood lately. Not that I lie often, it's just that I'm suddenly being so open. You could ask me any question and I'd answer it. My classmate - Aziat - has even run out of questions. He was asking questions from random ones - such as "contacts or glasses?" - to more personal ones, like, "How do you really feel about [her] now?" Since none of you asked it, I'm not going to answer that question to you. But if you decide to ask, there's a high probability that I'll answer it, looking at my current "mood" as of this week. Any question asked, at least right now, will be answered honestly and to the point. No guarded or deflecting answer, just the hard, cold truth.

Why did I just spend a whole paragraph on telling people that I'm going to be honest? Now I'm gonna get loads of personal questions, like "Who do you currently like?", "What did you like about [her]?" and "Who did you used to like?". Seriously, guys. Be more creative. If you can, don't ask the same questions over and over again. It gets annoying. Really.

I did this career personality test thing with a few of my classmates, and what I got was... Well, kinda contradicting. Letter-wise, I was ISC. That means Investigative (which is true), Social (so-so, but mostly false) and Controversial/Conventional (this one was totally wrong). It was done in the counseling room, and we ended up getting counseling. Oh, what joy! We had a group-counseling session to begin with, and by the next one, I was the only one there. My so-called "friends" ditched me. Again. Thanks a lot, Ben, Amirul and Aizat. Really appreciate it.

I'm taking another personality questionnaire, since apparently, the counselor thought that my personality was so complex. She also thought that my level of thinking and total overall ability to perform is 4.5 and above. Out of 5. I know, right? Me, 4.5! What a huge joke, right?

I had this really weird dream last night. I was chatting (well, texting) with this girl, and then she mentioned that she (finally, apparently) had a boyfriend. For some reason, I got jealous, and told her about my girlfriend (which apparently was also new - we haven't been on a first date yet). Then she got jealous as well. We sent a few texts back and forth, and the last text she sent me is still vivid in my mind. It was something along the lines of, "Is it a real date?", in a I-couldn't-care-less-but-I'm-still-hopeful-that-it's-not-real kinda tone. At least, it was in my dream. Before I could reply to that, I woke up.

Bad timing, eh?

I've got loads more to say, so keep up with me here! I don't want you snoozing on me. Speaking of snoozing, my tuition mate Zulkarnain fell asleep. During the class. Adlan noticed it first, and he gestured for me to wake him up. Which I did. By hitting him on the thigh. He woke up with a shock, but only on the second hit (yes, I had to hit him twice hard before he woke up). Of course, the whole class laughed loudly at him. He even said that he didn't realize he had fallen asleep. He was just sitting down, then *poof!* Welcome to Dreamland!

There's this girl at my tuition, well, maybe I like her. Maybe it's just another rebound. Heck, I dunno anymore. My feelings are all mixed up right now. I can't decide whether to do anything about this or not. On the one hand, she's cute and smart, and there'd be no harm in not only asking her out, but also with going out with her. Plus I think that I like her. On the other hand, I don't think it's a good year for relationships (since it's PMR year - kinda like SAT year, only at a lesser degree of importance), I made a bet with my cousin on who'd be in a relationship first loses (deadline would be next year), I want to actually to be able to drive my girlfriend to dates and I'm still not sure if she's just a person I'm rebounding "her" off, or if I really do like her. Remember an earlier post (the last one, I think)? Same story, different people.

More updates on that story as it comes in. On to you, Bob.

Thank you Charlie. It seems that this boy turned blogger named Sharrif, or Josh, as his blog readers know him, is addicted to this mint called Eclipse. Apparently he can't go a day without taking at least two without going crazy. I think this guy might need to have his addiction stopped or it could be harmful to his friends and family. Back to you, Charlie.

Yes, yes. I'm addicted to Eclipse. I don't know what got me to be like that. One moment, I was eating it. Next moment, I can't stop eating it without detoxing my body. It's weird, but the smell of the mints is enough to get me high. Is Eclipse being used as a drug? Oh, say it ain't so! Anyways, I'm kinda running out, (it's been the best distraction for my pain, by the way) so I'll most likely start double dosing.

Which leads to the primary topic of this post. Overdosage. Is it really that bad? Come on, it can't always land in Death. There has to be symptoms before the death, right? I'm not afraid of dying - no one should be - I'm more afraid of leaving behind someone who actually gives a care about me. If you look at the Picture Of The Month for July, you'll understand. But if things get too painful for me, I'll have to double dose. The pain isn't just in my stomach anymore, either. It's spreading around to my chest areas. This means my lungs and heart are in pain, too. Yes, I'm literally living the old love saying of, "It only hurts when I breathe". Which is true quite a lot of the time. We'll just have to wait and see.

There are loads more that I want to add, but I don't have the time, nor am I that cruel, boring you to death like this. So,

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

Why why WHY!?

"Change is what makes the world unique. Whoever does something over and over again and enjoys it, then he is less than pathetic."

Adrian Monk once said something along the lines of, "Change is good, as long as I'm not there when it happens." I couldn't agree more.

The teacher is going to be changing our class seating arrangements, because a few people went and failed. Gah, these people are giving a bad name for all guys everywhere. Then again, guys everywhere are doing that too... Meh.

Open Day was today, and it was interesting. Reason is simple. Once again, my class teacher gave my Mum the same script. The old, "Your son has a lot of potential. He would do so much better if he tried more and put more work into it." Yadda yadda yadda.

It's not that I have anything against her personally, but it's just that every teacher that's been with me say the same thing to my parents, regardless of how I act slash behave. It's like they have a script made just for me, which they pass around for the reason to tell my parents. Paranoid, much? Haha, that sounded so girly, don't you agree? Don't worry, I'm not a faggot slash homosexual person.

Speaking of this subject, just wanted to let you all that are interested know that the girl I had a rebound for is no longer a rebound. No, this doesn't mean that I like her more. It simply means that I'm (once again) a free agent. A person who has no ties to anyone emotionally at all. Just like so many of you.

That wasn't an insult, could you please drop the gun!? Thank you.

To those of you interested, I'm single and totally available now. From reading my blog, you should know how my mind works. *Wink wink* Haha, okay, I think that's enough for now.

I'm feeling sleepy. Night~!

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Whether I was joking or not on that offer, well, that's entirely up for you to decide. Haha!

Testing.

No more imitation - At least, not from you.

"Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but not so when the imitation is an insult."

Aaaah! Dang it! I am so seriously angry right now. Funny how the only two emotions I truly feel are happiness and anger. Especially anger. Which I'm feeling right now. Can you please remind me to control my urges, at least for now?

I'm totally losing it.

The urge is taking over me bit by bit. Man, I really gotta learn how Dexter can plan every detail properly and precisely. Maybe then I can actually live with this... This thing inside of me.

Anyways, let's get back to topic. A few girls in my class had this English presentation, and what was it they did? They did a role play that included them playing as four guys, and - guess what? - they totally degraded, humiliated and insulted us. They didn't even ask us for permission, let alone do it even a bit right.

Razin is a good artist, and wanna what they made "him" do? They made him show off his art. He never shows off his art, ever. Heck, most of the time we have to make him show us his latest drawing. Unless we asked him to draw something for us. That's a whole different story. I'm going to be honest here. When it comes to his drawings, Razin is a wee bit too humble than he should be. That's a good thing, I guess.

Faiz had muscles and works out. He doesn't need to show off, although he does show off at times, but usually when it's one of those "macho" acts. You know how it is, right, guys? Most of you guys think it's macho sometimes to show off your biceps (I don't understand it, though). They ended up making "him" do show off stuff out of the blue. Apparently they think that all boys like showing off whatever asset that they might have (like Razin's drawings and Faiz's... Erm... Brawn?)

Aizat was hit the worst. He is known as a loner to most of the classmates and he's usually seen with his eyes like slits. Like, Brock, from Pokemon, if you've ever watched it. But he never says the word stupid, he only has his eyes like that when he's bored or being teased, and he only disses the teacher if he was unfairly scolded. Like, when he finishes his work, did it the best he could, and then the teacher scold him for not doing it nicely. Stuff like that. Well, let's just say, they went and made "him" do everything opposite of that. "He" was having his eyes in every scenario, "he" was dissing the teacher when "he" was scolded correctly (this meaning that he really didn't do something, and was thus scolded) and "he" was using the words "stupid" a lot. So out of character.

I don't think mine was so bad, but I was insulted on personal things. Like, I use "Joshster" a lot because it's a connection of "Josh Carter", and "Joshster" sounded nicer than "Joshter". (Oh, I forgot to mention; they were putting these names around their necks, like a necklace. It was "us" with minor changes: Razin became Razif. Bros became Berush (that's Faiz's nickname - don't ask). Makoto became Sakoto (Aizat's Japanese name) and mine was just Joshster.)

Another one, when I say something, I only repeat it because I don't think people are listening. "I" was repeating it like "I" was some broken parrot that forgot to stop repeating a phrase! Then they did the biggest insult of all my non-mental illness rituals. They made "me" do the "camera motion" with "my" hands! (You know, the one where the right hand is going in a circular motion while the left hand is vertical, like holding a box) I only do that to remember specific memories! Whenever I do that, it's like a video saved into my memories. I never forget them. I just have to recall doing that, and I can remember. So it was the ultimate insult to me.

They didn't apologize to Aizat, their apology to me was totally insincere, but at least Faiz and Razon got good and proper apologies. Lucky guys. I think I'm done ranting, and now I'm going to just ramble on.

School was interesting today, for only one reason. My stomach wouldn't let me forget that I was supposed to be in pain. It got annoying after a while, especially when I lost my ability to stand a couple of times. Not to mention it started hurting while I was sitting down in class. I can't even sneeze, cough or yawn without pain. The coolest part was that no one noticed that I was in pain. Other than Amalina. She even criticized me for coming to school - I'm not really healthy enough to come to school but I insisted to my parents to let me come. Yeah, yeah, for now, I'm a nerd. I'm just going to study, then I'll watch TV, play games and be irresponsible nonstop!

Alright, I guess that's all I want to rant about. One last thing though. To Anis, Zulaikha, Maisarah and Sofea, what you did today was rude, belittling and mean. My nature is naturally forgiving, but I'm not going to be able to trust you girls. Ever.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

Was AWL. That's Absence With Leave.

"Cancer. That's the only word that can instill fear in the hearts of many."

No, I don't have cancer, though I wish I did. Nothing to do with me being sick of life (as my cousin thought), but that I had already kinda accepted that I might have cancer. It was a huge blow when it was only my appendix. It was giving me some unasked for trouble, the useless bum.

Yes, I was at the hospital. I recently (as in, last Saturday, and now it's Saturday) had a surgery. Oh, nothing major, just my appendix being taken out, as stated above. You know, the appendix is the most useless of all the "organs" (if it could be called an organ) in the human body. It does absolutely nothing, but if it gets swollen from an infection, a sickness, etc., it can kill you. And not quickly, either. It'll slowly and painfully take you out from the inside, like a natural poison, giving you a stabbing pain that just won't stop!

Plus, at the end of the surgery, it hurt like mad! Seriously, I never knew such pain. It hurt when I was still, it hurt while I was moving, it hurt all the freaking time! The painkillers didn't work either. When I asked for more of 'em, the nurse actually said that I was on too much, and that I might overdose. I wasn't sure whether to be scared, freaked out or in shock. So I just gave an incredulous look.

After one week, I can honestly say, it still freaking hurts! The painkillers I'm on barely numb the pain, and I really ought to find painkillers that actually work. The pain makes walking almost unbearable. I kinda have to slouch when I walk, and it hurts my back (I know you how old people feel now, and let me tell you: I totally respect you now!). My sister actually went and called me "Old Man". *Sigh*

It actually hurts while I'm typing this, and I have no idea how much longer I can stay like this before screaming in pain. Oh, my right arm hurts as well, since that was where the needle with the IV drip was put. Yep, it's going to be really interesting in school, trying to write again.

Wanna what makes all of this bearable and cool? My stitches! I got three holes, one on my right side, one on my left side and one directly above my bellybutton. The put a camera through my left side and used the right and middle areas to take the dumb useless thing out.

Another thing that I like about all this is that I actually like pain, believe it or not. I don't know why. So all this "screaming out in pain" stuff is really cool. I like holding pain in, seeing my limits, testing them again and again. Of course, I dramatize things to get what I want in this household. Shhh! Don't tell the family!

It's going to be really boring in school next week (yes, I got a whole week without school. Probably the most boring week of my life, to be honest). I won't be allowed to walk or run, or stand or do anything interesting or cool. I'm only allowed to sit down and stay put in my class seat until school is over. In fact, I'm not even supposed to be walking around the house. Which I'm doing a lot.

Speaking of school, I recently found out that there's this new girl named - you'll never believe it - (Eliza) Sofea. Just perfect, don't you agree? Apparently she even speaks and acts like the first Sofea. Speaking (or typing) of Sofea, I have to mention this. She's most probably a rebound but I'm interested in another girl, a Form 1 (13 year old). Yeah, either she's a rebound, or I actually like her. Probably the former, but hey, stranger things have happened.

I'm not going to go too detailed in here, since I don't know her that well, other than her name Emalai (obviously anagrammed), and that she's a 13 year old. 2 years younger than me. Yea, I can really see that one working out. If this is the real deal, I think I know why. She's the only girl - no, only person - that doesn't get repelled by the real me. That, and that she actually tries to communicate with me, unlike other people.

Oh, remind me to never be charged into the Selangor Medical Centre at Section 20 in Shah Alam ever again. The only shows that I liked while I was there were Nickelodeon and Discovery Channel. I think I have memorized every channel there is on Nickelodeon, especially the hated Yo Gabba Gabba commercial. The advertisements are stuck in my head! Make it stop, make it stop!!!!

Actually, I'm really supposed to be resting. It's 2:16 AM on Saturday, and I'm in front of the computer with the scars that will look like bullet wounds instead of surgical scars. Cool, eh? Well, I gues I really have to go to sleep. Plus, I'm sleepy. Night night~

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I was going to change my ending to, "For now and forever more", but I changed my mind. Night~!

True Lies

"Offing yourself is relatively easy. It's living with the consequences that's hard."

Hey.

Yeah, I'm still alive. No need to call Suicide Hotline! I'm fine. Really. Yes, I'm serious this time.

I guess I was just going through another rough patch. Depression is hard. How the heck do other depressed people stop from killing themselves?! Wait... I'm one of them. Heh, guess I kinda know the answer, since I'm still alive.

For the love of God, put down that phone! I don't need you to call my parents, okay? You'll just make things worse. It's not as if they actually care about my mental and emotional health. After all, they're the ones that laughed when I wanted to go to a therapist for my 3 lettered word disorder. I wonder how other parents would react? Would they actually bring their child to a therapist, or are they all the same?

Meh, it's not for me to know. I'm just a guy, not someone important.

Anyways, I've often been asked why I have a blog. Why? Because I have a lot to say and no one who listens. I'm not much of a writer. I tried keeping diaries, but they all kept failing. At least this way, I have someone to rant, vent, unleash or even cry to. I've been doing that a lot lately. Cry, I mean. Kinda hard not to, when you feel like no one cares. I'm not being emo. Just stating a fact. Unless you're depressed, you won't understand.

You know, I almost cried at school last week. Sure, go on. Laugh, call me a baby. A wimp. At least I'm man enough to show my emotions, unlike you so called "men". Before you ask, I almost cried because of my disorder. I suddenly had the compulsion to arrange everything properly, which kinda stopped me from having a normal conversation with my friend Razleen. That wasn't what made me almost cry though. No offense, Razleen, but I don't think I'll cry if I don't get to talk to you.

What almost did it was the fact that three of my classmates - people I thought friends - were tormenting me, moving the tables, chairs, bags on the tables and etc. It was making me insane! I wasn't sure whether to cry or to explode. I did a little of both, though not too loudly. I forgive them now, but if they do it again, I don't think I can. Unless you have what I have, you'd never understand. It's like a meat eater talking to a vegetarian about meat. The vegetarian would never understand, because he doesn't eat meat. Meh, something like that, anyways.

You know, I just realized this. If it wasn't for this blog I wouldn't be here. My emotions would be all bottled up, I'd have no one to talk to and *poof*, bye bye Sharrif, the guy that jumped off a building. Yeah, if I was gonna kill myself, I'd do that. Much quicker than cutting. Plus, it's more likely to succeed. Haha, I'm telling you guys how I'd off myself. That is so lame! *Starts giggling a bit*

Yep, this blog is my lifeline. *Pats computer adoringly* I don't know what I'd do without it. I think it's even the reason I'm still alive right now. Mark, Tom and Farah have completely deserted me. I haven't seen them in a bit over a week now, and only now have I realized how much I need them. What's funny is that more people are treating me nicer ever since I wrote that post. Kinda odd, don't cha think? They can't care, because I learned a few life lessons the hard way. These include:

i Nice guys finish last.
ii You can't trust anyone but yourself.
iii People say one thing but mean another.
iv Talk is cheap, but even actions lie.

Of course, there's more, but that's all right for now.

Wanna hear some cool stuff? Yes? No? Either way, since you got this far, you won't mind reading more. I can solve a Rubik's Cube! Woo hoo! Call me a dork, call me a geek, nerd, call me whatever you want, but I don't care! I can solve it and you can't! Haha, it feels so awesome actually being able to do it. Your words won't hurt me, because it's mind over matter. I don't mind 'cause you don't matter.

God! My parents are driving me up the wall! They say that they love me, but all they do is nag! Sure, a little nagging is fine. Annoying, but fine. Nagging a lot about important things is okay as well. But about trivial things? Man, that just makes me angry. They even nag when I did something they told me to. Like, my Mum told me to practice the piano, so I did. After I was done, she scolded me for practicing the piano, because there were guests. What the heck!? She told me to practice then, so I did! Don't get me started on my Dad!

If he calls me, and I answer very politely, "Yes, Dad?", he'll go ballistic and call me rude and impolite! I'd understand if I was doing that, but my sisters saw what happened and they even said to him, "What did he do? He wasn't being rude." Needless to say, they got into trouble as well.

Then, when they don't get their way even when they take away everything (I can really survive without entertainment if I want/have to), they start playing the bribery game. They'll go, "If you be good, you can watch TV again.", or, "If you don't be rude, I'll let you touch the computer."

Of course, I don't participate. Bribery is bad, people! They always give in. I'm too stubborn. Yeah, it's a bad thing, but I copied both my parents in this trait.

But I hate that I'm being like my Dad. From his lateness to his bad temper. Whenever I say something, I end up pausing. The reason is 'cause I realize that I'm sounding more and more like my Dad. It's shocking, but there's nothing I can do about it, is there?

Oops, I'm just asking for trouble now! It's 2:07 AM, and I think I'd better sleep! Night, y'all!

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I don't care if my parents read this. At least they'll get an awakening.

Inspiration for all

"Inspirational stories are for everyone, not just for people that can afford them."

Depending on what time it is there, good dawn, good morning, good afternoon, good evening and good dusk. Haha, sorry, I just couldn't stop myself from saying that. I know, it's been a while since I last posted something. This time it's not my fault! I just had nothing to say. *Big grin plastered on face*

Haha, as if. My mind is filled too much with ideas and words. I just am too freaking lazy to actually type something into here. So until I get something worth rambling about that's also worth reading, I guess you'll have to settle with these inspirational stories I came across. Enjoy! Each "obscure" or "hard to understand" part will be added a "lesson" to learn at the end of it.

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A butcher watching over his shop is really surprised when he sees a dog coming inside the shop. He shoos the away. But later, the dog is back again.

So he goes over to the dog and notices that the dog has a note in its mouth. He takes the note and the note reads "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please? The dog has the money in his mouth."

The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten dollar note there. So he takes the money and puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth. The butcher is so impressed and, since it's about closing time, he decides to shut up shop and follow the dog.

So off he goes. The dog is walking down the street when he comes to a level crossing.

The dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn. Then they do, and he walks across the road with the butcher following him all the way.

The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the timetable.

The butcher is in awe at this stage. The dog checks out the times, and then sits on one of the seats provided. Along comes a bus. The dog walks around to the front, looks at the number, and then goes back to his seat.

Another bus comes. Again, the dog goes and looks at the number, notices it's the right bus, and climbs on. The butcher, by now open-mouthed, follows him onto the bus.

The bus travels through the town and out into the suburbs, the dog looking at the scenery. Eventually he gets up, and moves to the front of the bus. He stands on 2 back paws and pushes the button to stop the bus. Then he gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Well, dog and butcher are walking along the road, and then the dog turns into a house. He walks up the path, and drops the groceries on the step.

Then he walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself against the door. He goes back down the path, runs up to the door and, again, throws himself against it. There's no answer at the house, so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow wall, and walks along the perimeter of the garden. He gets to the window, and beats his head against it several times, walks back, jumps off, and waits at the door.

The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts abusing the dog, kicking him and punching him, and swearing at him. The butcher runs up and stops the guy. "What in Heaven's name are you doing?! The dog is a genius! He could be on TV!" to which the man responds, "You call this clever? This is the second time this week that this stupid dog forgot his key!"

Lesson:

Most people will look at our faults instead of our accomplishments. Don't let these people keep you down.

_______________________________________________________

A man was invited to a dinner party. Since it wasn't anything fancy, he decided to wear simple clothes. But when he got there, no one acknowledged him. In fact, he was rudely ignored.

The man went back home and changed into some fancy clothes. He returns to the dinner party, but this time, he is greeted warmly by the people there. He went and took some food from the buffet table. As soon as he sat down, he poured the food all over his shirt.

The people there looked at him in bewilderment and then asked, "Why are you doing that?!"

He looked at them calmly and then replied, "When I was here earlier in shabby clothes, I was ignored. But when I wore some fancy clothes, I realized that you didn't invite me to this dinner party. You invited my clothes. So I fed my clothes instead."

Lesson:

Don't treat someone just by looking at what they wear. Treat them according to their principles and their values.

_______________________________________________________

Quote: Success in life is 7% knowledge and 93% attitude.

_______________________________________________________

Quote: You have two ears and one mouth. So talk less and listen more.

_______________________________________________________

When I was a teenager, I had unlimited dreams. I thought I could change the world.

When I was an adult, I had grown more mature. I realized that the world wouldn't change. So I then limited my original dream and decided that I could just change the country.

But, even this wasn't enough. As I reached old age, my last option was to change my family and those that were very close to me. Unfortunately, even they I could not change.

Finally, at my death bed, I realize (perhaps for the very first time). If had only just decided to change myself. By showing a good example, I could have been able to change my family. Then, with their love and support, I could have gotten my goal to change the country. And who knows? I could have maybe then been able to change the WORLD.

_______________________________________________________

To realize the value of ONE YEAR,
Ask a student who failed the final exam.

To realize the value of ONE MONTH,
Ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK,
Ask an editor of a weekly magazine.

To realize the value of ONE DAY,
Ask a daily wage labourer who has six kids to feed.

To realize the value of ONE HOUR,
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE,
Ask a person who missed a bus or train.

To realize the value of ONE SECOND,
Ask the person who survived an accident.

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND,
Ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics.

To realize the value of LIFE,
Ask the person who is now six feet under!

_______________________________________________________

A teacher enters a classroom. There is a jar on the table.

"If I put big rocks in it, can I put anything else?" He asks the class.

"Yes," says the class.

The teacher nodded, and put in small rocks. "Now can I put anything inside the jar?"

"No, sir," one of the pupils answered.

The teacher then poured some gravel into the jar. The gravel fit in between the cracks that was left by the rocks, both big and small. "How about now?" The teacher asked.

"Yes, sir!" A student said.

"Very good, Bobby," the teacher smiled, and continued to put sand into the jar. The sand went and occupied the small spaces left. "I guess that nothing more can be put inside the jar, am I right?" he asked.

"No sir, nothing else can be put." The students said.

The teacher smiled, and then then open-mouthed students just looked on as he poured water into the jar, filling the jar to the brim.

Lesson:

The lesson this story is telling us is that the jar is our life, and what we put in it are our priorities. Put in the big rocks, things such as your son's baseball game, your daughter's violin recital. Your parents' birthdays. Your anniversary with your spouse. Only after that should you put in the less important things in your life, from the small rocks to the water. Things such as client meetings and job interviews. They are not the big rocks in your life.

_______________________________________________________

A couple, whom we shall call John and Mary, had a nice home and two lovely children, a boy and a girl. John had a good job and had just been asked to go on a business trip to another city and would be gone for several days. It was decided that Mary needed an outing and would go along too. They hired a reliable woman to care for the children and made the trip, returning home a little earlier than they had planned.

As they drove into their home town feeling glad to be back, they noticed smoke, and they went off their usual route to see what it was. They found a home in flames. Mary said, "Oh well it isn't our fire, let's go home."

But John drove closer and exclaimed, "That home belongs to Fred Jones who works at the plant. He wouldn't be off work yet, maybe there is something we could do." "It has nothing to do with us." Protested Mary. "You have your good clothes on lets not get any closer."

But John drove up and stopped and they were both horror stricken to see the whole house in flames. A woman on the lawn was in hysterics screaming, "The children! Get the children!" John grabbed her by the shoulder saying, "Get a hold of yourself and tell us where the children are!" "In the basement," sobbed the woman, "down the hall and to the left."

In spite of Mary's protests John grabbed the water hose and soaked his clothes, put his wet handkerchief on his head and bolted for the basement which was full of smoke and scorching hot. He found the door and grabbed two children, holding one under each arm like the football player he was. As he left he could hear some more whimpering. He delivered the two badly frightened and nearly suffocated children into waiting arms and filled his lungs with fresh air and started back asking how many more children were down there. They told him two more and Mary grabbed his arm and screamed, "John! Don't go back! It's suicide! That house will cave in any second!"

But he shook her off and went back by feeling his way down the smoke filled hallway and into the room. It seemed an eternity before he found both children and started back. They were all three coughing and he stooped low to get what available air he could. As he stumbled up the endless steps the thought went through his mind that there was something strangely familiar about the little bodies clinging to him, and at last when they came out into the sunlight and fresh air, he found that he had just rescued his own children.

The baby-sitter had left them at this home while she did some shopping.

Lesson:

You should care for everyone, not just people that are important to you. By doing that, you'll end up helping not only the people that you care about, but yourself as well.

_______________________________________________________

I was in New York the other day and rode with a friend in a taxi. When we got out, my friend said to the driver, “Thank you for the ride. You did a superb job of driving.”

The taxi driver was stunned for a second. Then he said, “Are you a wise guy or something?”

“No, my dear man, and I'm not putting you on. I admire the way you keep cool in heavy traffic.”

“Yeah,” the driver said and drove off.

“What was that all about?” I asked.

“I am trying to bring love back to New York," he said. "I believe it's the only thing that can save the city.”

“How can one man save New York?”

“It's not only one man. I believe I have made that taxi driver's day. Suppose he has 20 fares. He's going to be nice to those 20 fares because someone was nice to him. Those fares in turn will be kinder to their employees or shopkeepers or waiters or even their own families. Eventually the goodwill could spread to at least 1,000 people. Now that isn't bad, is it?”

“But you're depending on that taxi driver to pass your goodwill to others.”

“I'm not depending on it,” my friend said. “I'm aware that the system isn't foolproof so I might deal with ten different people today. If out of ten I can make three happy, then eventually I can indirectly influence the attitudes of 3,000 more.”

“It sounds good on paper,” I admitted, “but I'm not sure it works in practice.”

“Nothing is lost if it doesn't. It didn't take any of my time to tell that man he was doing a good job. He neither received a larger tip nor a smaller tip. If it fell on deaf ears, so what? Tomorrow there will be another taxi driver I can try to make happy.”

“You're some kind of a nut,” I said.

“That shows how cynical you have become. I have made a study of this. The thing that seems to be lacking, besides the money of course, for our postal employees, is that no one tells people who work for the post office what a good job they're doing.”

“But they're not doing a good job.”

“They're not doing a good job because they feel no one cares if they do or not. Why shouldn't someone say a kind word to them?”

We were walking past a structure in the process of being built and passed five workmen eating lunch. My friend stopped. “That's a magnificent job you men have done. It must have been difficult and dangerous work.”

The workmen eyed my friend suspiciously.

“When will it be finished?”

“June,” a man grunted.

“Ah. That's very impressive. You must all be very proud.”

We walked away. I said to him, “I haven't seen anyone like you since The Man From La Mancha.”

“When those men digest my words, they will feel better for it. Somehow the city will benefit from their happiness.”

“But you can't do this alone!" I protested. "You're just one man.

“The most important thing is not to get discouraged. Making people in the city become kind is not an easy job, but if I enlist other people in my campaign...”

“You just winked at a very plain-looking woman,” I said.

“Yes, I know," he replied. "And if she's a schoolteacher, her class will be in for a fantastic day.”

Lesson: A little bit of kindness can change the world.

_______________________________________________________

A teacher walked into a classroom carrying a glass. He walked in front and then lifted the glass.

"Is the glass heavy?" He asked.

The students looked at each other confused and then answered, "No, teacher."

"If I hold it for a few minutes, will it get any heavier?" He asked.

"No, teacher," was the response.

"What will happen if I hold it for a few hours?" He asked.

"Your hand would start hurting," a student said.

"Very good!" He added, "Now how about if I hold it for one night?"

"Your arm would probably fall off!" The class said.

"What should I do, then?"

"Put down the glass!" The class shouted.

Lesson:

Life's problems are like that. They're small, but if we dwell on them too long and too much, they will hurt us much more painfully than if we had just thought about them for a few minutes. So when life gives you troubles, don't dwell on them too long. You'll only be hurting yourself if you do.

_______________________________________________________

Okay, I think that's enough for now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~