A Guy's Point Of View

"Everything has two sides to a story. Good and evil; Sweet and bitter; Love and hate; Innocent and guilty; Boys and girls."

(NOTE: This has been edited, and is not mine in the first place. In fact, after this bracket, it's all part of an edit until the end)

Girls, you may agree to this, but when it actually happens, 96% of girls don't realize it until it's too late and the guy who did it is so frustrated that he has moved on to someone who will take notice and appreciate him.

From a guy's point of view:

We don't care if you talk to other guys. We don't care if you're friends with other guys. But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off. It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.

We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 AM in the morning, we do get a little concerned. Nothing is that important at 2 AM that it can't wait till the next morning.

When we tell you that you're pretty, beautiful, gorgeous, cute, stunning or anything similar to that, we freaking mean it. Don't tell us we're wrong, because we'll just stop trying to convince you.

One of the sexiest thing about a girl is her self confidence. (Yeah, you can quote me on that) Don't be mad when we hold the door for you. We're not being chauvinists that think you're too weak to open the door. We're trying to be a gentleman. Take advantage of the mood that we're in.

If we give you an expensive gift, don't feel guilty about it. We saved and/or worked hard to get it, and to us, you deserve it. If we got you a present that you don't like, tell us, but don't tell us in such a harsh way. There is a thing called "tact", you know. Whenever we give you gifts for no apparent reason, don't think that we're only giving it to you because we're in trouble. We do it because we love you.

Let us pay for you! Don't "feel bad" about it. We not only enjoy doing it, but it's what we expect to do. Just smile and say, "thank you."

Kiss us when no one is watching. But if you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be even more impressed.

You don't have to get dressed up for us! If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't need to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every makeup that you own. We like you for who you are and not what you are. Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her PJ's, or when she's wearing one of my T-shirts and boxers, compared to when she's all dolled up.

Don't take everything we say seriously. Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. Try to see the beauty in it.

Don't get angry easily. We never mean to hurt you. Don't be so quick to get jealous, either. Let us talk and be friends with other girls. You don't have anything to worry about. After all, we chose you.

Stop using magazines and the media as your bible. Please don't talk about "how hot Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise or Jesse McCartney is" in front of us. Frankly, we don't care. You have girlfriends for that kind of stuff.

Whatever happened to the word "handsome"?

And girls, we can not stress this enough: If you aren't being treated right by a guy, don't wait for him to change. Ditch him, because he probably won't. Sorry, but guys like that are a disgrace to the male population. He's an a*s and you should find someone who will treat you with utter respect.

Someone who will honour your morals. Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest. Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes. Someone who will love you no matter how bad you make them feel, or what you do to them. Someone who will stop whatever they're doing just to look you in the eyes and say...

"I love you."

And actually mean it.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. To those that know the original, they'll know what I've added, erased, modified and fixed. Whether I've made it better or worse is debatable. I'm pretty sure that most - if not all - guys (those that aren't jerks, anyway) will agree with this. So girls, please, look at our point of view.

Dead, ressurected, dead

"My number one philosophy in life is this: God before parents, parents before family (this means siblings, relatives, kids, spouse, etc.), family before friends, friends before acquaintances, acquaintances before strangers and strangers before myself. I don't care what you think of it, but that's how I live my life."

I don't believe it. I really don't freaking believe it. I got rejected by a girl because I was "too nice". What kind of reason is that?!

All this while, I thought that girls liked guys that were nice. Man, if what I thought was actually the opposite of what's true... Arrh! I haven't been living life properly! Ha ha, I'm just joking about that. I like the way I am, although it is a bit unsettling that girls will reject me for "being me", so to speak.

Thankfully though, the girl that rejected me wasn't the one, not by a long shot. There's loads of other girls, and like my friend says, "One girl down another 7 billion to go!". Ha ha, yeah, I thought there were more girls too. Ha ha!

Speaking of "the one"... I think I've found her. She really fits and everything. I'm skeptical though, judging by my current failures with the female species. That, and because I'm only 15. I'm not supposed to find "the one" yet. So, yeah. I'm gonna keep an eye out on here, and if I still think that she's "the one" after a period of time (I'm not gonna say when or who, in case I jinx it), I'm gonna go and ask her out.

Yes, me, ask her out. You can stop laughing now.

God, I'm addicted to this song, especially since it fits my love life exactly. Of course, I'm not going to put in the song's title or singer in here, since I know my cousins read this. Ha ha, you gotta blame them, not me.

Is it "wedding season" right now? There's suddenly so many weddings. My neighbours had weddings yesterday, and it was creepy to see a lot of people getting married at around the same time. Not only that, but my cousin, (a serial dater, by the way) got married last week. My cousin Luqman and I had to be the "security guards" for the wedding (No, really. We had to hold these spears and stand next to the bride and groom and be their guards) and it was fun. The adults couldn't make up their minds though, on what our facial expression should be. When we smiled, they scolded us. When we looked serious, they made fun of us. Nice, real nice.

The wedding was held on the Saturday after my PMR trials, (to those that don't know, PMR is Malaysia's equivalent to Britain's O levels. Or something like that) which was really convenient for me. Don't get me started on the trials. It was freaking hard! Okay, so maybe I'm over exaggerating the exams a bit, but I'm not kidding for the Geography and Life Studies papers. I got a "C" for Geography (honestly, I'm quite glad that I passed. Yes, it was that difficult) and the highest mark was 82%. Fortunately it was a guy. Go men! Ha ha, sorry, bias moment. Heh.

I'm not sure about the other papers, but I'm kinda confident that I'll be able to ace Math. Ha ha, I always ace Math, so that kinda goes without saying. (I'm not bragging, merely being honest. I'm kinda gifted at Math for some reason, so I ace it every time) I'm not too worried about my Islamic Studies, but I'm a nervous wreck for Life Studies and History. I don't know why, but I just feel un-confident about it. Yes, I know "un-confident" isn't a word. Yet. I just made it up. Sue me.

Arrrrh!!!! I don't know why my parents suddenly want to go on outings with all of us these past two days. Sure, I like hanging out with my parents and all (no sarcasm here; I really mean it), but I wanted to go to Random Alphabets' RWP (Read while Waiting Project), where everyone that joins (most of them Random Agents - I'm one of them, for your information) is trying to promote reading. It's a good cause, and I love doing anything that RA's leader Zain H.D. can think of. His plans are always fun, and they always have a good message of some kind.

Unfortunately, I couldn't go. It was being held simultaneously with other cities like Melbourne, Brisbane, Sydney, Singapore to name a few. To those that went, tell me what happened! Was it successful? Has reading been promoted at all? I need to know!!!

Anyways, I went and watched a few movies with my family, and the movie we first wanted to watch was "Don't Mess With The Zohan". That was one of our biggest mistakes ever. There was so many perverted and dirty scenes in it that I'm shocked that it's rated "U"! We blamed Dad for the choice, because he chose that movie. Ha ha, yeah. The next day, (which was yesterday) we watched "Wall-E". To those that haven't watched it yet, I highly recommend it! Wait, lemme just emphasize it a bit more. I highly recommend watching it!

I watched it twice and I loved it both times. Once was with my cousin, which was earlier in the week and the other time was with my family yesterday. Both times, I laughed and cried (yes, I cried. Just because I'm a guy doesn't mean that I'm devoid of any feelings. And just 'cause I cried doesn't mean that I'm a wuss, a sensitive romantic or a homosexual!) at all the same times. 8.5 over 10 (it's not 9.5 because the opening was kinda... Slow, to be honest). Zohan gets 5, but only because I'm in a good mood right now.

School's gonna start tomorrow. I'm not sure whether to be anxious, worried or relieved. So I'm gonna be all three. On the one hand, I'll finally be able to meet my friends again, I'm gonna get my exam papers and see how badly (or, if a miracle happens, good) I did, and I'll be able to see the girl I think is "the one" plus I get to finally do something, instead of stay at home doing nothing but watch TV and... *Shudder* Study. On the other hand... It's school. You can see my obvious dilemma on what emotion to be feeling, don't you?

Right, then. This will probably be my last blog post until about 18th of October. The reason being my PMR is coming soon, and I have to study an extra extra amount. Yes, the extra was doubled on purpose for emphasis. *Sigh* I'm gonna miss blogging. And reading people's blog. And annoying people in cyberspace until they log out. Good times, good times... Ha ha, I guess I'm going to end this post now. It's getting a wee bit too long.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. Here's a post for people who want to understand Islam accurately:

Ten Things People Should Know About Islam

P.P.S. Luqman, I want my pencil case back!

Back home

"There's something wrong with the saying Home Sweet Home. There's nothing sweet about it. But... I'd rather be home than anywhere else."

I'm back home. I'd have posted sooner, but I wasn't allowed online. But when I sneaked on, BlogSpot wouldn't let me post anything for some reason. Finally, since I'm finally doing touch-ups on my History folio, I took this opportunity to blog. I'm going to talk about what happened the last few days. Be warned. This post will be very long. Even for my normal standard.

On Saturday morning, my sister and I had to get up early to go to the Islamic camp. It's by YMP. That's Young Muslims Project, by the way. They have a FaceBook group, so check it out when you get the chance to. Or if you're interested. Whichever one comes first.

Obviously, we got there late. My Dad was sending, what do you expect? Although, to his merit, this time we only got lost, instead of Dad's usual lateness. It's kinda an inside joke now, about my Dad's "punctuality". (Whenever he fetches me from school, there's a 99% chance I'll get home late).

We first introduced each other. Except, though, there was this nice little twist. We had to introduce someone else. The person beside us, to be frank. We had to introduce his/her name, two things (s)he likes and two thing (s)he dislikes as well as their favourite animal. Me and the two people that introduced each other (yeah, we were weird in that while most of the people were in pairs, we were in threes). The guy on my right was Daniel; he was introduced by the guy on his right (Hadi). I introduced Hadi, and Daniel introduced me. It's kinda confusing to tell you without showing any pictures, so I hope you understand.

After the half hour break, we had a workshop on empathy. We were basically learning how to see from the other person's point of view. In essence, what we were doing was learning how to solve conflicts better. We did some role play, and I was in the second set. (I'm proud to admit that I volunteered without hesitation - in front of around 60 people) Our "argument" was this: I was the captain of a football team, and I just took out our strikers. Because of that, we lost. The vice-captain (the guy I'm "arguing" with) was angry at me. Apparently, our argument was so convincing that the speaker (Kuranda Seyit) decided to intervene. He said that it seemed like I was about to beat Marwan (the vice-captain) up. I need to note here that he's taller and older than me. Which kinda made that statement funny. Of course, ever since that role play session, everyone knew me as "captain". Especially during the "Free and Easy" session.

After we had our lunch and our Zuhur prayers, we had another talk. This time, it was about boy-girl relationships. Boy, was that talk interesting. Now, I'm not gonna go into any details, but basically we were talking about how to have a halal relationship. Like, getting our parent's blessings, and etc. Well, as you can expect, we were so interested in the talk that we ended up skipping our tea break. Which then, of course, ended up with us not being able to complete another session called "The Great Debate". Don't ask me what it's about, 'cause I have no idea. But I think it involves a debate, though.

Then, probably because we messed up the schedule, we had a really fun game called "When the big wind blows". Someone has to stand up, and say, "The big wind blows for [insert something like, "everyone wearing black"]", and those that have it [in this case, are wearing black] have to get up and sit at another chair. Yeah, that was really fun.

Since our plans were messed up, we went straight to "Free and Easy" (remember that I mentioned it earlier?). Here, we had 2 whole hours to do whatever we liked. We first played some soccer, and I remember painfully when someone - I think it was Mamoug - kicked the ball very very hard and it hit me in my most sensitive area.

Yes, yes, I know it's funny, but c'mon, don't laugh that much!

Before that, though, everyone on my team were calling "captain" (because of the role playing thing), even though I clearly wasn't. It's kinda our inside joke, if we ever meet again. Heh. After the girls complained that they weren't having any fun, we decided to play kickball. Which was really interesting, since none of us had ever played it before. Heck, none of us even played baseball before. (Kickball is kinda like that... Hard to explain. Meh) It was boys against girls. The first round, us guys were losing 7-6. Then, the game ended with 8-8. Yeah, it was a draw. But if the guy (dang it, I can't remember his name!) had caught the ball, we'd have won 8-7! Well, what can you do?

After we had dinner and did our Maghrib prayers, we watched a documentary by Kuranda Seyit - one of the speakers. It was about his life in Australia, being a Muslim immigrant from Turkey. It was beautifully made, and I think only a beast from the dark (i.e. something not human) wouldn't have felt touched by it. It was really amazing. I might be able to get the CD one day (most of us wanted it), and if I do, I'll be sure to lend it to you. (Note: only applicable to people that I know personally) Before we left, we had a cool game where the person says a scene [say, a battlefield] and everyone has to do something that will complete the scene yet harmonize the situation.

Example, the scene is "a war zone". People ended up walking to the "stage" doing war poses. Some people were medics. I myself was an infantry unit that was killed by behind. Remember, we weren't supposed to do something that stood out. We're supposed to do something that'll harmonize the place. As an example, our first scene was "pasar malam" (night market, Malaysian style), and it was a catastrophe. The stalls were a mess. The road was missing (because everyone was so jumbled up), and there was a motorcyclist in the middle of the stalls.

But the last one, "Hari Raya celebrations" (Eid celebrations), was perfect. There were some people playing with those cannon fireworks ourside; I was messing my friend's hairstyle, and he was pouring a drink for a girl; the said girl was giving her friend some food as well as having her cup poured with water; some people were playing PS2 in the living room; others were seeking forgiveness from parents; there were some that were checking to see if the money they got were real... It made everything perfect, since it all fit in. Man, that was the best game, ever. We were sad when we had to go to sleep. (One rule for the game: No talking allowed)

Then, we ate supper (I'm still unsure what's the difference between supper and dinner) and went to sleep. Before I forget, remind me to shoot Faheem countless times with a BB gun. He kept shooting everyone that passed his bunk with an electronic BB machine gun. Man, that hurt...

We were supposed to sleep at 11.30, but because we talked so much, we ended up sleeping at around... Oh, I dunno, sometime around 2? Yeah, around there.

The next day, we woke up at 5.30, for Fajr prayers. Five freaking thirty! That's only, what? 3 hours of sleep! Thankfully, I managed to get up. I'm gonna thank Aiman here, for waking me up by hitting my butt with a towel (or pillow - I can't really remember). Good times, gooood times...

At 6.30, there was aerobics. The majority of us, though, went to sleep instead of exercising. The next workshop would be at 9, so we wanted to get as much sleep as possible. Yeah, yeah, we should have slept earlier. Sue us for wanting to socialize more before going to bed. Heh.

After we all woke up and refreshed ourselves, we had a workshop on how to make a mark as a Muslim. How to leave an impression on the world as a Muslim, and in a good way, not like those stupid suicide bombers. A note here: Islam bans Muslims to react with violence, unless to defend yourself. It's filled with religious stuff, so I'm going to have to stop talking about this one, since I'm pretty sure not everyone that reads this is a Muslim.

The next workshop was really interesting. It was generally about "How to be a teenage Muslim and still be cool". They kinda just taught us that we weren't really restricted because we didn't want to, say, smoke, or drink beer, or do drugs. But they were restricted, because that's all they can think about to have fun. After all, as a Muslim, who says we can't bike ride? We can't rock climb, parachute, scuba diving, swim and all those other fun things?

There was more, but this blog is getting a wee bit too long, so I don't want to bore you with more meaningless details. A little too late, but meh.

After the Zuhur prayers and lunch, (I was "volunteered" to be the Imam; Oh, and I forgot to mention. On Saturday, for a reason I can't remember, Kuranda said that I was probably going to be the next Prime Minister! Ha ha, is that funny or what? ... Come on, laugh!) we had a really nice talk by a professor. I'm not gonna say her name, (partly because I don't want to, and partyly because I... Forgot) but she was a really good speaker. This talk was about sex before marriage.

Yes, you read right. Sex. Of course, it wasn't about sex in detail. It was about how we reach sexual maturity after puberty (10 years old nowadays) and by the time we get married (30, on average). That's 20 years! 20 years! Well, because of that, we obviously became "creative", so to speak. You can see it in loads of teens. In fact, this is the reason why teenagers end up having sex before marriage. Now I'm gonna share some cool facts and statistics that I learned or were told in the camp. Prepare to be amazed.

For every baby born, there is at least two abortions.

Out of 887 teenage girls, aged 13 - 16, from around 40 different schools, only one was a virgin.

A survey was done to 18 year olds. 40% admitted that they started dating when they were 13 (I'm part of the 60%! Woo! Ha ha). By the age of 18,

84% admitted to having held hands.
85% admitted to kissing and/or necking.
83% admitted to petting.

~> 9% have had pre-marital sex. Most of them were boys.

All I can say to those are... Wow. People are... Wow. Yeah, I can't really say much, can I? I'm almost speechless. Now, to those think that they're ready to have sex, read this. Please.

You're Not Ready To Have Sex If...

~You think sex = love.
~You're afraid to say no.
~You think everyone else is doing it.
~You don't know the facts about pregnancy.
~You don't think a woman can get pregnant the first time.
~It goes against your religious and moral beliefs.
~You're doing it to prove something. (*Cough loser cough*)
~You think it will make your partner love you.
~You think it will make you love your partner.

To every teenager out there... It's okay to wait! Save sex for marriage! (Yes, it's "save", not "safe")

We had a final game, which was called "Zip Zap Boing". I'm not going into details here, because I'm too lazy to. If you wanna know how it's played, lemme know, and then I'll let you know. Oh, and I forgot to mention, we had two other activities. Both included non verbal communication, and writing was not allowed. For one, we had to construct a "sacred space" (a place you go to feel calm, relaxed, at ease, etc.; My groups' "sacred space" was the stars: You just have to look up, and it's always there.).

In the other activity, we were grouped up in pairs, and one person had to give instructions on how to draw, and the other person wasn't allowed to speak. The person with the picture had to say stuff like, "Okay, draw a triangle. Now another triangle below it. Next, under the second triangle, draw a horizontal rectangle." for, say, a tree. I apparently didn't get the memo, cause I was saying stuff like, "Alright, draw a horizontal line. Then, draw two vertical lines going downwards on both sides. Then connect the two vertical lines together with a horizontal line." for a square. Amazingly, it turned out really good.

We had to go home not long after. My sisters brought Aboo, and everyone was fawning over him. He ended up showing off, by climbing on my head and looking at everyone. Ha ha, he was so cute. We took a group picture, and went home. The people I met there... Marwan, Amar, Syafiq, Faheem, Shakeen... It's gonna be hard to forget about them. I just hope that I manage to keep in touch.

Well, Monday ended up being a really uninteresting day compared to the weekend. In fact, I skipped school. Official reason? I had a headache. (It wasn't that bad, though. It was just a reason). Unofficial reason? I skipped it. Yeah, it's a good thing that we're no longer learning anything, and it's all just pop quizzes and work sheets. I was so not in the mood of any of that.

I came to school on the other days. Well, I'm gonna end this long post now.

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

Edit: I forgot to mention, the reason I didn't say we prayed Asar or Isyak is because we combined them. We can do that, if we're out of our hometown. Oh, and to those interested, Anwar Ibrahim's daughter, Hanna, was there. Just wanted to let you know.

One hectic week... OR Dating blind

"Blind dating isn't only for the blind. After all, love itself is blind."

First of all, let me apologize for not being able to blog. Not only was I very busy, but it has been a really crazy and hectic week for me. Don't forget to add that I can only use the computer in the weekends.

Right. You're probably wondering why it's been so hectic.

Well, let's just put it this way. My Mum suddenly wants me to have a girlfriend, and she's actually forcing me to date. Of course, I refused. What kind of person in their right minds want to have a girlfriend (or boyfriend, if you're a girl) without actually liking the person? I'll only date a girl if I really really like her. You know, there is this girl I'm planning on asking out (yep, a Sharrif first!) but I'm chickening out. I've never done this kinda thing before, you know, so I'm shaking like a rattlesnake's tail.

My plan is to ask her out on Valentine's Day, but I still have no better way to do it other than by saying, "Hey, um... Will you, uh, be my Valentine?" Yeah, reall smooth. Not to mention cliché as well. Meh. What'll happen, will happen, and what won't, won't. We'll just see.

Anyways, back to my actual topic. She said that if I didn't have a girlfriend by next year, I'd be set up on a blind date. Finally, on Friday, I decided to negotiate with my Mum. Finally, she caved. She won't set me up on a blind date until I'm 21 or 25. I can't remember which. Either way, I still have a lot of time to find a girl willing enough to date me. *Clears throat* Any girl interested out there? *Winks "flirtatiously"*

Haha., okay, enough of that. Now I'm pretty sure you're thinking, "How is being forced to go on a date enough to make it a hectic week?". You're not...? Meh, I'm still going to tell you what else happened.

You know how school is boring? Don't be afraid to admit it. You hate school, don't you? Be it the strict dress code, dumb rules or evil sadistic teachers, there's always something to hate about school. Hey, don't get it wrong here. I actually love learning. It's just that I hate waking up to go to school. I'd rather stay at home and learn there, like through unschooling. Or going through homeschooling things like tuition. Which is why I decided to start a student revolution. Taking tips from "School-survival.net", me and my friends are starting a revolution!

We need at least 200 people to join us. So far, we only have about 20. I kinda forgot to recruit more people, ha ha. So if you're interested, give me a call. I'm at 3 Gigih. Ask for Sharrif. Remember, we don't promote violence. Only change. Note: I'm only searching for recruits in my school, which is SMKS 9.

Alright, I'm getting sleepy.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. I got back my RuneScape account! Finally! For those that want to add me, my username is Josh_Carter4.

Overdosage, and etc.

"Is overdose really that bad? Besides death, what other symptoms are there?"

I'm going to do it. I really am.

650 MG is definitely not working for my pain. I'm gonna start doubling the dosage. Just so you know, if I don't post a new post by next month, it means I'm dead.

No, not intentionally. But still dead. (No words will help against this. I'm not suicidal, just in pain)

Anyways... On to cheerier news (did I spell that right? "Cheerier"? Meh, the evil red spelling lines aren't there, so I guess it is). A lot of things have been happening, too much to actually mention specifically. So I'll just do my best, and apologies to any and all unorganized-ness.

I've been in this really weird honest mood lately. Not that I lie often, it's just that I'm suddenly being so open. You could ask me any question and I'd answer it. My classmate - Aziat - has even run out of questions. He was asking questions from random ones - such as "contacts or glasses?" - to more personal ones, like, "How do you really feel about [her] now?" Since none of you asked it, I'm not going to answer that question to you. But if you decide to ask, there's a high probability that I'll answer it, looking at my current "mood" as of this week. Any question asked, at least right now, will be answered honestly and to the point. No guarded or deflecting answer, just the hard, cold truth.

Why did I just spend a whole paragraph on telling people that I'm going to be honest? Now I'm gonna get loads of personal questions, like "Who do you currently like?", "What did you like about [her]?" and "Who did you used to like?". Seriously, guys. Be more creative. If you can, don't ask the same questions over and over again. It gets annoying. Really.

I did this career personality test thing with a few of my classmates, and what I got was... Well, kinda contradicting. Letter-wise, I was ISC. That means Investigative (which is true), Social (so-so, but mostly false) and Controversial/Conventional (this one was totally wrong). It was done in the counseling room, and we ended up getting counseling. Oh, what joy! We had a group-counseling session to begin with, and by the next one, I was the only one there. My so-called "friends" ditched me. Again. Thanks a lot, Ben, Amirul and Aizat. Really appreciate it.

I'm taking another personality questionnaire, since apparently, the counselor thought that my personality was so complex. She also thought that my level of thinking and total overall ability to perform is 4.5 and above. Out of 5. I know, right? Me, 4.5! What a huge joke, right?

I had this really weird dream last night. I was chatting (well, texting) with this girl, and then she mentioned that she (finally, apparently) had a boyfriend. For some reason, I got jealous, and told her about my girlfriend (which apparently was also new - we haven't been on a first date yet). Then she got jealous as well. We sent a few texts back and forth, and the last text she sent me is still vivid in my mind. It was something along the lines of, "Is it a real date?", in a I-couldn't-care-less-but-I'm-still-hopeful-that-it's-not-real kinda tone. At least, it was in my dream. Before I could reply to that, I woke up.

Bad timing, eh?

I've got loads more to say, so keep up with me here! I don't want you snoozing on me. Speaking of snoozing, my tuition mate Zulkarnain fell asleep. During the class. Adlan noticed it first, and he gestured for me to wake him up. Which I did. By hitting him on the thigh. He woke up with a shock, but only on the second hit (yes, I had to hit him twice hard before he woke up). Of course, the whole class laughed loudly at him. He even said that he didn't realize he had fallen asleep. He was just sitting down, then *poof!* Welcome to Dreamland!

There's this girl at my tuition, well, maybe I like her. Maybe it's just another rebound. Heck, I dunno anymore. My feelings are all mixed up right now. I can't decide whether to do anything about this or not. On the one hand, she's cute and smart, and there'd be no harm in not only asking her out, but also with going out with her. Plus I think that I like her. On the other hand, I don't think it's a good year for relationships (since it's PMR year - kinda like SAT year, only at a lesser degree of importance), I made a bet with my cousin on who'd be in a relationship first loses (deadline would be next year), I want to actually to be able to drive my girlfriend to dates and I'm still not sure if she's just a person I'm rebounding "her" off, or if I really do like her. Remember an earlier post (the last one, I think)? Same story, different people.

More updates on that story as it comes in. On to you, Bob.

Thank you Charlie. It seems that this boy turned blogger named Sharrif, or Josh, as his blog readers know him, is addicted to this mint called Eclipse. Apparently he can't go a day without taking at least two without going crazy. I think this guy might need to have his addiction stopped or it could be harmful to his friends and family. Back to you, Charlie.

Yes, yes. I'm addicted to Eclipse. I don't know what got me to be like that. One moment, I was eating it. Next moment, I can't stop eating it without detoxing my body. It's weird, but the smell of the mints is enough to get me high. Is Eclipse being used as a drug? Oh, say it ain't so! Anyways, I'm kinda running out, (it's been the best distraction for my pain, by the way) so I'll most likely start double dosing.

Which leads to the primary topic of this post. Overdosage. Is it really that bad? Come on, it can't always land in Death. There has to be symptoms before the death, right? I'm not afraid of dying - no one should be - I'm more afraid of leaving behind someone who actually gives a care about me. If you look at the Picture Of The Month for July, you'll understand. But if things get too painful for me, I'll have to double dose. The pain isn't just in my stomach anymore, either. It's spreading around to my chest areas. This means my lungs and heart are in pain, too. Yes, I'm literally living the old love saying of, "It only hurts when I breathe". Which is true quite a lot of the time. We'll just have to wait and see.

There are loads more that I want to add, but I don't have the time, nor am I that cruel, boring you to death like this. So,

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

A few secrets from PostSecret

"Aaah. Secrets. It's the one thing that, once shared, is gone. Everybody has a secret that could break your heart. Remember that, and the world is one step closer to being a better place."

These are three secrets from PostSecret that I truly connected with. The reason they aren't saved in my computer like the rest (actually, they are) is because of the words on 'em. At the website (which updates every Sunday), the words are typed beneath them. I put the pictures here, so that I can keep looking and remembering these secrets. It's a three part secret.

I. The Island of Capri is where I fell in love with Sarah. I was a photographer, but the only thing I have to remember that weekend are 3 postcards. I couldn't stand the thought of missing one moment with her looking through a lens.




II. This is where I fell in love with Sarah. Wherever she is now, whoever she is with I pray that she is happy. Loving her saved my life.




III. These were the moments of my life I loved her more than anything, but it was never meant to be. Through the anxiety attacks and suicidal thoughts these moments reassured my life was worth living. I got better help because of her.

For the first time since I was a child I know what it is to be happy.

Yep. There you go. Saved in my blog for as long as this blog is here. Hope Frank doesn't get angry. It is, after all, technically his now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

Last post!!!!

"The first things are always thought upon happily, but the last of anything is often frowned upon. So treat everything as if it were your first, and never as if it were your last."

Yep. This is it. My last post.

Until 11 days, anyway. Haha, to those that I shocked, I'm just letting you know that I'm going for Umrah in Mekkah for the next 11 days, so don't expect any new posts until May. Well, today was fairly interesting. I went to tuition, and on the way there there was this accident. Someone actually died. It was both cool and scary. It actually made me think.

Life is so short.

Make the best of everyday, of every moment. You never know when it's your turn. Treat your enemies like your best friends. Your ex's as if you never went out. Love like you've never been hurt and laugh like there's no tomorrow, because technically, there never is. The past is gone. The present never happens. The future is unknown. So live accordingly. Live in the "now".

On another note, I did a this test on how fast I typed and this is what I got:

44 words

Speedtest

44?! That's it?! I am NOT that slow! So, being the stubborn thing that I am, I did it once more. This was my result:

49 words

Speed test

Actually, this is 50. But I made one mistake, and that is my final result. God, this is frustrating. Alright, one more time...

50 words

Speedtest

Dang it!!!!!!!! I got 52 words, but 2 wrong answers. Okay, LAST time! I'll be happy with my answer. (No I won't)

51 words

Speed test

Alright!!! 291 characters per minute. 51 words! That's more like it! Yes, I know. I rock. Plus, I finally beat my pet sister Reysha. The first two times she beat me by one word. One! Do you know how annoying that is?!

If you don't, it's extremely annoying. Anyways,

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~

EDIT: 56 words

Speed test

Sorry, couldn't resist. Heh.

Inspiration for all

"Inspirational stories are for everyone, not just for people that can afford them."

Depending on what time it is there, good dawn, good morning, good afternoon, good evening and good dusk. Haha, sorry, I just couldn't stop myself from saying that. I know, it's been a while since I last posted something. This time it's not my fault! I just had nothing to say. *Big grin plastered on face*

Haha, as if. My mind is filled too much with ideas and words. I just am too freaking lazy to actually type something into here. So until I get something worth rambling about that's also worth reading, I guess you'll have to settle with these inspirational stories I came across. Enjoy! Each "obscure" or "hard to understand" part will be added a "lesson" to learn at the end of it.

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A butcher watching over his shop is really surprised when he sees a dog coming inside the shop. He shoos the away. But later, the dog is back again.

So he goes over to the dog and notices that the dog has a note in its mouth. He takes the note and the note reads "Can I have 12 sausages and a leg of lamb, please? The dog has the money in his mouth."

The butcher looks inside and, lo and behold, there is a ten dollar note there. So he takes the money and puts the sausages and lamb in a bag, placing it in the dog's mouth. The butcher is so impressed and, since it's about closing time, he decides to shut up shop and follow the dog.

So off he goes. The dog is walking down the street when he comes to a level crossing.

The dog puts down the bag, jumps up and presses the button. Then he waits patiently, bag in mouth, for the lights to turn. Then they do, and he walks across the road with the butcher following him all the way.

The dog then comes to a bus stop, and starts looking at the timetable.

The butcher is in awe at this stage. The dog checks out the times, and then sits on one of the seats provided. Along comes a bus. The dog walks around to the front, looks at the number, and then goes back to his seat.

Another bus comes. Again, the dog goes and looks at the number, notices it's the right bus, and climbs on. The butcher, by now open-mouthed, follows him onto the bus.

The bus travels through the town and out into the suburbs, the dog looking at the scenery. Eventually he gets up, and moves to the front of the bus. He stands on 2 back paws and pushes the button to stop the bus. Then he gets off, his groceries still in his mouth.

Well, dog and butcher are walking along the road, and then the dog turns into a house. He walks up the path, and drops the groceries on the step.

Then he walks back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself against the door. He goes back down the path, runs up to the door and, again, throws himself against it. There's no answer at the house, so the dog goes back down the path, jumps up on a narrow wall, and walks along the perimeter of the garden. He gets to the window, and beats his head against it several times, walks back, jumps off, and waits at the door.

The butcher watches as a big guy opens the door, and starts abusing the dog, kicking him and punching him, and swearing at him. The butcher runs up and stops the guy. "What in Heaven's name are you doing?! The dog is a genius! He could be on TV!" to which the man responds, "You call this clever? This is the second time this week that this stupid dog forgot his key!"

Lesson:

Most people will look at our faults instead of our accomplishments. Don't let these people keep you down.

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A man was invited to a dinner party. Since it wasn't anything fancy, he decided to wear simple clothes. But when he got there, no one acknowledged him. In fact, he was rudely ignored.

The man went back home and changed into some fancy clothes. He returns to the dinner party, but this time, he is greeted warmly by the people there. He went and took some food from the buffet table. As soon as he sat down, he poured the food all over his shirt.

The people there looked at him in bewilderment and then asked, "Why are you doing that?!"

He looked at them calmly and then replied, "When I was here earlier in shabby clothes, I was ignored. But when I wore some fancy clothes, I realized that you didn't invite me to this dinner party. You invited my clothes. So I fed my clothes instead."

Lesson:

Don't treat someone just by looking at what they wear. Treat them according to their principles and their values.

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Quote: Success in life is 7% knowledge and 93% attitude.

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Quote: You have two ears and one mouth. So talk less and listen more.

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When I was a teenager, I had unlimited dreams. I thought I could change the world.

When I was an adult, I had grown more mature. I realized that the world wouldn't change. So I then limited my original dream and decided that I could just change the country.

But, even this wasn't enough. As I reached old age, my last option was to change my family and those that were very close to me. Unfortunately, even they I could not change.

Finally, at my death bed, I realize (perhaps for the very first time). If had only just decided to change myself. By showing a good example, I could have been able to change my family. Then, with their love and support, I could have gotten my goal to change the country. And who knows? I could have maybe then been able to change the WORLD.

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To realize the value of ONE YEAR,
Ask a student who failed the final exam.

To realize the value of ONE MONTH,
Ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK,
Ask an editor of a weekly magazine.

To realize the value of ONE DAY,
Ask a daily wage labourer who has six kids to feed.

To realize the value of ONE HOUR,
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE,
Ask a person who missed a bus or train.

To realize the value of ONE SECOND,
Ask the person who survived an accident.

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND,
Ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics.

To realize the value of LIFE,
Ask the person who is now six feet under!

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A teacher enters a classroom. There is a jar on the table.

"If I put big rocks in it, can I put anything else?" He asks the class.

"Yes," says the class.

The teacher nodded, and put in small rocks. "Now can I put anything inside the jar?"

"No, sir," one of the pupils answered.

The teacher then poured some gravel into the jar. The gravel fit in between the cracks that was left by the rocks, both big and small. "How about now?" The teacher asked.

"Yes, sir!" A student said.

"Very good, Bobby," the teacher smiled, and continued to put sand into the jar. The sand went and occupied the small spaces left. "I guess that nothing more can be put inside the jar, am I right?" he asked.

"No sir, nothing else can be put." The students said.

The teacher smiled, and then then open-mouthed students just looked on as he poured water into the jar, filling the jar to the brim.

Lesson:

The lesson this story is telling us is that the jar is our life, and what we put in it are our priorities. Put in the big rocks, things such as your son's baseball game, your daughter's violin recital. Your parents' birthdays. Your anniversary with your spouse. Only after that should you put in the less important things in your life, from the small rocks to the water. Things such as client meetings and job interviews. They are not the big rocks in your life.

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A couple, whom we shall call John and Mary, had a nice home and two lovely children, a boy and a girl. John had a good job and had just been asked to go on a business trip to another city and would be gone for several days. It was decided that Mary needed an outing and would go along too. They hired a reliable woman to care for the children and made the trip, returning home a little earlier than they had planned.

As they drove into their home town feeling glad to be back, they noticed smoke, and they went off their usual route to see what it was. They found a home in flames. Mary said, "Oh well it isn't our fire, let's go home."

But John drove closer and exclaimed, "That home belongs to Fred Jones who works at the plant. He wouldn't be off work yet, maybe there is something we could do." "It has nothing to do with us." Protested Mary. "You have your good clothes on lets not get any closer."

But John drove up and stopped and they were both horror stricken to see the whole house in flames. A woman on the lawn was in hysterics screaming, "The children! Get the children!" John grabbed her by the shoulder saying, "Get a hold of yourself and tell us where the children are!" "In the basement," sobbed the woman, "down the hall and to the left."

In spite of Mary's protests John grabbed the water hose and soaked his clothes, put his wet handkerchief on his head and bolted for the basement which was full of smoke and scorching hot. He found the door and grabbed two children, holding one under each arm like the football player he was. As he left he could hear some more whimpering. He delivered the two badly frightened and nearly suffocated children into waiting arms and filled his lungs with fresh air and started back asking how many more children were down there. They told him two more and Mary grabbed his arm and screamed, "John! Don't go back! It's suicide! That house will cave in any second!"

But he shook her off and went back by feeling his way down the smoke filled hallway and into the room. It seemed an eternity before he found both children and started back. They were all three coughing and he stooped low to get what available air he could. As he stumbled up the endless steps the thought went through his mind that there was something strangely familiar about the little bodies clinging to him, and at last when they came out into the sunlight and fresh air, he found that he had just rescued his own children.

The baby-sitter had left them at this home while she did some shopping.

Lesson:

You should care for everyone, not just people that are important to you. By doing that, you'll end up helping not only the people that you care about, but yourself as well.

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I was in New York the other day and rode with a friend in a taxi. When we got out, my friend said to the driver, “Thank you for the ride. You did a superb job of driving.”

The taxi driver was stunned for a second. Then he said, “Are you a wise guy or something?”

“No, my dear man, and I'm not putting you on. I admire the way you keep cool in heavy traffic.”

“Yeah,” the driver said and drove off.

“What was that all about?” I asked.

“I am trying to bring love back to New York," he said. "I believe it's the only thing that can save the city.”

“How can one man save New York?”

“It's not only one man. I believe I have made that taxi driver's day. Suppose he has 20 fares. He's going to be nice to those 20 fares because someone was nice to him. Those fares in turn will be kinder to their employees or shopkeepers or waiters or even their own families. Eventually the goodwill could spread to at least 1,000 people. Now that isn't bad, is it?”

“But you're depending on that taxi driver to pass your goodwill to others.”

“I'm not depending on it,” my friend said. “I'm aware that the system isn't foolproof so I might deal with ten different people today. If out of ten I can make three happy, then eventually I can indirectly influence the attitudes of 3,000 more.”

“It sounds good on paper,” I admitted, “but I'm not sure it works in practice.”

“Nothing is lost if it doesn't. It didn't take any of my time to tell that man he was doing a good job. He neither received a larger tip nor a smaller tip. If it fell on deaf ears, so what? Tomorrow there will be another taxi driver I can try to make happy.”

“You're some kind of a nut,” I said.

“That shows how cynical you have become. I have made a study of this. The thing that seems to be lacking, besides the money of course, for our postal employees, is that no one tells people who work for the post office what a good job they're doing.”

“But they're not doing a good job.”

“They're not doing a good job because they feel no one cares if they do or not. Why shouldn't someone say a kind word to them?”

We were walking past a structure in the process of being built and passed five workmen eating lunch. My friend stopped. “That's a magnificent job you men have done. It must have been difficult and dangerous work.”

The workmen eyed my friend suspiciously.

“When will it be finished?”

“June,” a man grunted.

“Ah. That's very impressive. You must all be very proud.”

We walked away. I said to him, “I haven't seen anyone like you since The Man From La Mancha.”

“When those men digest my words, they will feel better for it. Somehow the city will benefit from their happiness.”

“But you can't do this alone!" I protested. "You're just one man.

“The most important thing is not to get discouraged. Making people in the city become kind is not an easy job, but if I enlist other people in my campaign...”

“You just winked at a very plain-looking woman,” I said.

“Yes, I know," he replied. "And if she's a schoolteacher, her class will be in for a fantastic day.”

Lesson: A little bit of kindness can change the world.

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A teacher walked into a classroom carrying a glass. He walked in front and then lifted the glass.

"Is the glass heavy?" He asked.

The students looked at each other confused and then answered, "No, teacher."

"If I hold it for a few minutes, will it get any heavier?" He asked.

"No, teacher," was the response.

"What will happen if I hold it for a few hours?" He asked.

"Your hand would start hurting," a student said.

"Very good!" He added, "Now how about if I hold it for one night?"

"Your arm would probably fall off!" The class said.

"What should I do, then?"

"Put down the glass!" The class shouted.

Lesson:

Life's problems are like that. They're small, but if we dwell on them too long and too much, they will hurt us much more painfully than if we had just thought about them for a few minutes. So when life gives you troubles, don't dwell on them too long. You'll only be hurting yourself if you do.

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Okay, I think that's enough for now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~