Continuous Creativity

"Life is a game of chess. You need strategy, and you win some, you lose some."

You're all probably wondering what happened at the chess competition a few days ago. There were eight rounds of games, and it was divided into 2 days. Oddly, though, instead of it being 4 games for each day, it was divided into 3 and 5. I unfortunately played extremely badly the first day, and I was surprised that I actually managed to win a game. (Yes, I only won 1 out of 3 games the first day). The best part though, (WARNING: BRAGGING ALERT!) on the second day, I managed to get 4 wins and 1 draw out of 5 games! How awesome is that?! Woo!

So, in the end, I ended up getting 5.5 points from the entire competition. (a draw is equal to 0.5 points, a win is 1 point and a loss is 0 points) I was surprised that I managed to be in the top 20 (or 25; the list wasn't really accurate, and it was confusing, too) in the entire game. That means, of course, that I'm in the top 25-ish of the entire district. The fact that I can do that is both great and kinda creepy.

Another interesting thing happened that I haven't mentioned. Remember that girl I feel stupid, useless, etc. around? Well, I don't feel that anymore. After I had a meeting with her outside of school, I suddenly didn't feel the inferiority anymore. That was both weird and a relief, since now I'm convinced it's not something that I don't want it to be. (Figure out yourself what that means. Haha)

Speaking of girls, I kinda have a new "problem" now. There's one girl that when I first met her, I felt totally comfortable around her. (Explanation: I have this weird thing where I make people feel really comfortable around me, but for some reason, I don't feel comfortable around people until I know them well) I guess you can say that there's a connection I feel with her, even though I'm not sure about my feelings. Anyways, I recently found out (from her friends) that her friend likes me.

To clarify.

I have a "connection" of sorts with Girl A. Girl A's friend tells me that Girl B (a close friend of Girl A) has a crush on me. Of course, I'm not sure it's true, because I am utterly useless at figuring out if someone likes me until the person doesn't like me anymore. I'm not asking for advice, because I'm not going to do anything about it. I just mentioned it because it's part of my life, and this blog is technically my life in print. So to speak. Or err, type.

Oh, about the chess competition, I forgot to mention that in the "under-18" category, our school or, more specifically, my group) managed enough points to win number 7 in he entire district. Yep, I'm feeling really proud of that. Yusof and I contributed the most points, with both of us giving 5.5 points. Shin Leong gave 4 points and Izzul gave 3.5. At least he improved. Last year, ht only managed to get 1.5! That was embarrassing.

My birthday's coming up soon, I bet most of you didn't know that. Haha, I'll turn Sweet Sixteen on the 16th of this month. Yes, 2 days after Valentine's. Which is tomorrow. God, it's tomorrow, and I don't have any idea who to ask to be my Valentine's! Haha, just kidding. I'm not the type to ask for Valentine's. Long story, and I'm not interested to explain it.

Unfortunately for me, my birthday is on a Monday. For some reason, I didn't have a party planned, so the most I'm gonna do is go and watch a movie with some friends this Sunday. *Sighs deeply*, it's not gonna be the same, without a party, cakes and fun. I've had a party since I can remember. My philosophy on birthdays is this: You're never too old to have a birthday party. Most disagree, though.

Oh, right, I just remembered! I had a spelling test for my French class, (the French don't know how to spell! Seriously) and I managed to get 9 over 10 words right! I forgot the stupid accent. The word I spelled wrongly was Auôt. I spelt it as Auot. It means "August", by the way. Now I need to get ready for my Oral test. I'm talking about my hobby, just so you know.

speaking (or typing) of Oral, I have this English Oral test that my so-called "friends voluntered me against my will. Oh well, I'll have my revenge. I'm gonna talk about something so boring, they're gonna wish that they'd never chosen me. The topic? The origins of chess! Haha, boring, no?

Alright, then, I'm feeling sleepy right now. I'll continue my life's update some other time, then!

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

Random Rubbish

"War is a bad thing. But shouldn't it be loner, or at least be a four letter word?"

Have you ever noticed that people love talking about war a lot? It's as if war is a universal topic. Why can't we talk about more important things, like how to fix the environment, how to stop domestic problems, how to stop world hunger? Instead, every newspaper and almost every influential person of power will talk about war. At least most of them nowadays are talking about how to end it. I'm sure Obama will do a great job.

But really, think about it. World War 1, World War 2, Desert Storm, Iraq, and now it's Israil and Gaza. When will the wars stop? It can't be that hard. I mean, just stop fighting each other. What sickens me the most about this is that young people, the soldiers, will be the ones to die. The ones that will be leaving wives to become widows, kids to be become orphans, families to lose a brother or a son.

What's the point? Oil? Money? Power? Just to prove a Goddang point? (This topic is not worth a swear word) Can't we all just compromise and agree to disagree? If all we ever talk about is war, don't you think that the little kids, the children, will start blaming the government and other people about this? They won't grow up to stop it, they'll probably be the ones that either put the blame on some other party, or the ones that go off to join in! Wars are just a lame attempt at begging for attention. maybe if we all just ignore the parties involved, they'll stop fighting.

As you can see, I'm really against this "activity". Like Albert Einstein once said, "War is merely an excuse for murder". The only time you're allowed to murder someone is in self-defense, and there's no other way to save your life. I even detest that people will look at you differently and have opinions about you depending on what you buy! Like McDonalds, for example. Just because a guy buys something to eat from them, he (or she) is considered a supporter of Israil. What the Hell?! It's just food!

*Talks a few deep breaths to cakm down*

You're probably wondering about why this sudden outburst of war. Don't worry, I probably won't talk about it. Much. Seriously, though, why am I judged for what I buy? No, I didn't buy anything from McDonald's. I'm a bit anti-fast food. Except for Dominoes and KFC. I don't know what it is about them that I can't resist! Anyhow, I digress. If I'm about to buy anything appaewntly "Israil related", I'm sneered at, and seen as a traitor to Muslims. ANd if I don't donate at all for Gaza, I'm seen as a traitor to Muslims again! It's a charity for crying out loud!

Sorry you all had to read that. I just had to express my really intense hate of this topic. It can't be that hard to decline a war. I may be wrong, since I'm no politician, but I'm saying it from a citizen's point of view. Maybe we should ask the politicians invloved to join in the war they started. That should teach them a lesson.

God, I'm hungry today. I don't know why. Right now, I'm eating about 6 sandwiches with choclate in them, 2 egg sandwiches and 4 sausages. Okay, it's not much, I know. But still. It looks like a lot on my plate. Hey, maybe my hromones are finally kicking in. That'll explain why I'm starting to become a sap around this one particular person. Ha ha. If I'm right, and it is hormones, then woo hoo! I'm actually gonna go taller! Here's hoping that I'll get a growth spurt! *Crosses fingers*

I don't know why, but I'm blogging a lot lately. Maybe it's my sudden space of time. It's as if I'm suddenly very free. About that, you won't believe what happened today. I was stood up by three girls at the exact same time. Ha ha, I know you're shocked at this piece of information. Lemme explain first.

Remember I mentioned about the History presentation that I had to do today? Well, I was doing it with three girls, and we were meeting up at a restaurant. I waited there for half an hour, and then suddenly Fatin calls and tells me that they couldn't make it. Elli just mentioned that she couldn't come, and Umairah's Mum was sick, so she had no transport. That means, of course, that we'll be postponing it to Monday, which is a school holiday. Monday morning, to be precise. Haha, what joy!

Oh, right, I have to go now. I'm going to my Dad's friend's Chinese New Year open house thing. Maybe I'll blog again tomorrow. Who knows?

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S., Najihah, can't wait for you to get back! Don't forget to teach me Italian! Haha.

Stop stop stop!!!!

I believe your soul is split into three, each part made up of a best friend, a partner, as well as yourself."

I have no idea what that has to do with the post, by the way. It's just that, I'm online, butmy friends aren't. Or, they're online, but they're busy. So they might as well be offline, no? Obviously, I don't have anything to do while I'm online right now. Heeeello, blogging!

This is stupid. Blogger is being retarded right now. It keeps giving those red underlines thingys to entire sentences. What the heck? They're not even connected as one word! Oh, well, I guess it doesn't affect me. Much. But it's still annoying to see.

Wow, that was sudden. Suddenly a lot of my friends came online. I'll be right back. I'm gonna talk to them for a while.

*Time passes*

That was fun. Where was I? Oh, right. My topic. What was it again...? Aah, now I remember! Something about my feelings. Ew, I'm a guy that's gonna talk about his feelings to the world. I just realized how gay that is. Right. No turning back now.

Normally, when I'm around people, I usually feel like an equal around them. Doesn't matter who it is that I'm talking to. I've never felt superior, and I've never felt inferior to anyone before. Which is sorta a problem when I talk to some adults. I just act inferior. Anyways, with this girl I just met, I'm suddenly feeling stupid around her. I get lost with words, and I feel like a stinkin' idiot. I don't get butterflies in my stomach, though. So does that mean that I like her, or doesn't it? I kinda need help with this. New experience and all.

Right, while I let you guys ponder about that. I have an announcement to make. Please please don't apologize about my... You know. I really hate apologies. I'll explain why later. But anyways, apologies like these are worse in my opinion because it's not even your fault. Now, you're probably wondering why I don't like apologies. The reason is simple. If all people had to do was say two words to get off the hook, what's the point? I'd rather they not do it again any more. "Talk is cheap", after all.

*Sighs* I have to go and do this stupid History presentation thing tomorrow. We'll be at the mall, which is a good thing,I guess. I'm not really into malls, y'know? After all, all you can do there is shop for things. (this includes food, so don't go talking about eating there) I like shopping, but I don't like standing in shops. Weird, right? You know, I even have to be there tomorrow, since I won't be at school for the presentation. I'll be at a chess competition at another school. Ignoring all your jibes about being a nerd, (it's geek, not nerd) I'll tell you all about it after the competition. (it's on next Tuesday and Wednesday)

About the competition, my friends and I are so dead. We only have one day to practivce, and that day is on Sunday.Plus, we might end up fighting against a couple of grandmasters. Can you believe it? The guy is only like, 16, (my age) and he's a grandmaster. That's a very high rating! God, people like these need a social life. No offense, Edward!

This is just perfect. Blogger is being stupid again. This time, though, it's not correcting any of my spelling mistakes! I have to re-check everything and re-read everything. Whch is a good thing, I guess. But still. I don't have the time to do that! Now you'll have to excuse any spelling mistakes I may or may not have done.

Oh, yeah, check out the new blog I linked up. Becky, Bella and Scarlett have the best non-individual life blog I've read, so just give it a shot. My opinion might not be your opinion, though, so don't blame me if you don't like it.

Night night, I have to wake up early tomorrow!

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

I'm only talking about it here

"Death is a reminder of life."

Well, this sorta proves it. Fate is really cruel with to me. To those that don't know, (which is probably most of you here) my maternal grandfather passed away today. I had to go home early from school to go to the funeral. At least there's good news, in that I don't have any homework. Honestly, that would've sucked.

Oh, right, you don't know why I think Fate is cruel. Well, 6 years ago, my paternal grandfather passed away too, in February. He died on the 23rd of this month, 6 years ago. Both of them died from an illness. (Both different illnesses, though) On top of that, I actually only had more fun with my grandfathers than with my grandmothers.

I'm starting to get paranoid about this month, and it's my birthday month! How messed up is that? Now if anyone I know (especially if they're old) gets sick in February, I'm gonna start tensing up and preparing myself as if they're going to die. Yes, crazy to the extreme. I know I'm not making much sense, but really, both of my favourite grandparents died passed away in the same month. It's not fair! It so isn't!

*Takes a deep breath* Well, at least they're in a better place now. There's no reason that I know for them to go down there, so all that's left to do is wait. Of course, after this post I don't think I'll talk about it. Let's just say, it's too painful to think about dying with negative emotions. Plus, I kinda don't like getting sympathies or pity, you know? Oh, and before I forget, to everyone out there, please don't say "I'm sorry your Grandfather died", or anything similar to that to me, please! To me, it just feels as if you did something to him! I just don't like it, okay?

I actually have more to say about what happened in my life, like what happened in the debate team, what's going on with that girl I talked about last time, about this cute girl I noticed (don't worry, guys, I just want to get to know her as a friend) as well as what teasings I'm getting this year. I'mjust not in the mood to elaborta a lot today. Maybe later, okay?

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

My dream girl, and other less important stuff

"There is always that one single person out there for you. All you have to do is look, and you'll find him/her."

I've been asked this question so many times that I've finally decided to record this in an online place that anyone can find. It'll make my life much more easier. Plus, I don't need to keep writing it down. To those too thick to understand what it is I'm talking about, (guys, I clearly wrote it as my topic) I'm talking about the qualities that I want in my dream girl.

Brace yourself, this is going to be a long paragraph. Seriously. After reading this, you'll understand why I'm still single, why I'll never get a girlfriend and how high my expectations are. So grab a chair, get comfortable and don't forget the popcorn! I'm dividing this into two sections, one for her looks, and one for her personality.

In looks:

To be honest, all I want in a girl is her personality. But if I had to choose something about her outer appearance, I guess I'd have to choose... Beautiful eyes. Yes, that's all I'd ever want in a girl, from her looks. I guess it helps that I don't see people's looks for some reason.

In personality:

Alright, this is where you'll probably get bored reading. This will be written in a few paragraphs (hey, I was serious when I said I had high expectations) so don't go off running anywhere until you're done. Or, you can skip it now and go straight below to the "other less important stuff" down there. No? You sure? Okay, then, onwards we go. (There is no particular order in the stuff I'm going to put)

She has to be friendly to everyone, and this includes her enemies as well. She has to be nice to the people around her. She has to be sweet and charming, but not in the bad way. She also has to be smart, not only in her studies (which isn't actually so important) but in life, or, in other words, "street smart", I guess. In that sense, she should know what she wants out of life, and is ambitious enough to work for it. She also has to be kind to not only people that are older than her, but to people the same age as her as well as to kids that are younger. She must be an animal lover, as well as environmentally conscious as well.

She has to choose her friends over me, and is willing to let me choose my friends over her. Of course, I don't mean this all the time, just during the times that she or I have to choose between each other or our friends. I don't want her to neglect her friends, and I don't want my friends neglected as well. After all, we met our friends first. I don't want her to be jealous when I talk to other girls. I chose her, not any of them. I want her to be comfortable enough to talk to other guys without thinking that I'll get jealous.

She has to be able to trust me with anything, and because of this, we have to be able to talk about anything without feeling embarrassed or any other negative emotion at all. We need to be able to connect on just more than with words, in a way that I can just stand beside her and have a great and memorable time. Of course, I can't believe I forgot to mention this, but she has to like/love me for who I am, and not what she wants me to be.

She has to be funny, as well as have a sense of humour, but will still laugh at the lame jokes that I'll say. After that, though, she has to tell me that it wasn't really funny (but in private, not in public). She has to be witty, and that she always has a comeback for anything. (This might be a bad thing, but meh, I don't wanna be with someone that won't know how to talk back to me) She has to understand that I have this really weird need to be protective of my loved ones, and that she has to let me be protective of her. Albeit that, she still has to be able to take care of herself in every aspect, which includes physically, mentally, emotionally and financially (there's more, but I'm just stating these four). She also should not be materialistic.

She has to be independent in her life, as well as responsible with whatever she does. I'd prefer it if she was very open with her parents, although this isn't actually a must. She has to be feminine, dainty and polite. Vulgar girls are such turn offs, as well as girls that smoke She has to be health conscious as well, and be physically fit. I do not want her to be anything with "ist" at the end, meaning, I don't want her to be sexist, racist, feminist, facist, and so on. She has to know that the both of us are equals. Having said that, though, she has to allow me to be a gentleman every now and then and allow me to do things like pay the bill, open doors, and etc. She has to know that it's not sexism, and that I don't think that she can do things like that, but that I want to do those things for her.

She has to be able to get along with my friends and family, or at the very least, make an effort to get along. She has to be able to mind all of my annoyances and my bad quirkes, and she has to be able to appreciate all the romantic plans that I have for her. She has to like compliments given to her, but not until she needs it showered every single day. She has to know her strengths and weaknesses, and know where she needs to put more effort into. She has to compliment me, and by this I mean that her strengths are my weaknesses, and vice-versa. The last thing that I can think of right now, is that she has to have an at least decent amount of self-esteem. I don't think I could ever live with a girl that doesn't know how great she really is.

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Yep, there you go. All the qualities of my dream girl. Okay, I'm going to be honest with you. There's actually more, but I kinda forgot what the rest was. I wrote it in a book, and I remember that it was longer than this. No worries, I'll just put it up as an edit later on.

Now I bet that you're wondering about how come there aren't any bad qualities. First of all, it's the qualities of my dream girl! Of course I only put in the good stuff. B, if she had all of these, any bad qualities would be overlooked. I wouldn't care if she did anything bad, as long as she had all the rest of the qualities listed above.

Now, on to the "other less important stuff". I'm in the debate team! Well, sort of. Once again, I'm chosen as the researcher. I don't know what it is about me that's seen as a researcher. At least I'm the head researcher this time. Woo! I didn't get the drama, though, which is kinda annoying since I got in last year. For some reason, they changed the rules this year, and the seniors from the Drama team had to re-audition. Oh, well, there's always next year, I suppose.

Our school is turning into Hogwarts! Just minus the magic bit. We're following a new system made by the principal, so now every single thing we do will be erased from our House points. I'm in Red, so I guess that technically makes me a Gryffindor. Woot! Wait. Not woot. I'll be called the "Harry Potter" kid again by total strangers. *Sigh*

Red is currently in third. Blue is second, and Green is last. They're in the negatives. Which is both cool and scary, since being in the negatives is actually possible. Yellow is first. This is really freaky, since Yellow has never ever been first, ever since the school was opened. That's about 12 years ago, to those that don't know (which is probably a lot of you).

The principal is kinda stupid at doing this, though, because of the way the system works. Minor bad things you do, and you lose 10 points. Major bad things, 50. Now, that's not so bad, until you look at the points that you get. The minor good things that you do, 5 points. The major? 10. How does the teacher expect us to get any points?!

"Ooh, I passed up my homework on time! 5 points earned! Dang, I didn't do it properly. 10 points lost."

"Alright! I got awarded gold for ! 10 points, yeah! Oh, no! The teacher caught me bringing my handphone to school! Arg! We lost 50 points!!"

End of the day, each House only loses points, and doesn't gain any. At least Blue and Red are very close together, albeit Blue in the lead between the two. Go Purnama! You can do it! (Red = Purnama, which means "Full Moon"; Blue = Segara, and I don't really know what it means; Green = Buana, which is a kind of fish; Yellow = Suria, which means "Light of the Sun")

Yep, I have no life. And this was obviously seen when I went to school last Wednesday. It's a holiday, so that shows how much of a loser I am. And people insist that I'm popular. Haha! As if. Oh, right, you're wondering why I went to school. Easily said, it was a meeting for the debaters and researches. Fortunately, I wasn't the first one there. Two of my friends, Emillio ("Em") and Marinah ("Rin") were there already.

But that doesn't make me less of a loser, mind you. It just makes them more of a loser than I am. Haha, just kidding, guys.

But something very interesting happened later that day. As we were about to go back, D wanted to ride on the teacher's bike. At first, we all disagreed and tried to talk him out of it, but in the end, he got to ride the bike. Of course, the best thing happened - he crashed. We all vowed not to tell anyone, and that is why I'm not writing any names that were directly involved in that incident.

Well, I guess that's all I can say right now. My homework pile has not even been touched, so I am extremely dead when I have to go to school tomorrow. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I'll have time to finish at least the ones due tomorrow by tonight. Wish me luck, guys!

Salut,

~Josh the Joshster~

P.S. My birthday is on the 16th of this month. Now that you know this, be sure to give me presents! Haha.