Monday 14 September 2009

Sarcasm

"Sarcasm is a beautiful art."

Objective:

Are you mean and sarcastic?

Have you ever answered people ‘meanly’ and sarcastically?

If yes, show us how mean and sarcastic you are!

If no, then you should try at least once in your life with this note.



Rule:

Respond to these as sarcastic/mean as you could.

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If an annoying person says:


1) I am cute.

Define "cute".


2) I am the most beautiful/handsome.

In what Universe? Your own?


3) See, everyone likes me because I am rich and famous!

Obviously. Why else would they like you?


4) Unlike you, I am perfectly multi-skilled.

Being able to burp the alphabet and squirt milk out your nose isn't an achievement, buddy.


5) You don’t know me? I am an artist; I have albums.

That garbage was music?

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If an annoying pretty/handsome woman/man says:

1) I know you like me.

Oh, honey, you're so out of your league.


2) What you looking at? I am not interested in you!

Oops, I was just staring at that hideous thing on your shoulders. What is that freak of nature?

3) Sorry, you are nice but seriously not my type!

Your type is "lame and desperate", right? Oh, wait, no, that's just you.


4) UNLESS you are rich, don’t dream that I will get a ride with you!

Why would I want a pathetic little thing like you to have a ride with me?


5) Look, I am pretty/handsome; I can make people hate you!

Being hated by your imaginary friends isn't really a big deal for me.


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If an annoying extremely ugly woman/man says:


1) I think you and I can make a good couple.

Maybe, but why would I want to take the risk of finding out?


2) May I have your cell phone number? Please please please?

*Laughs*


3) Hi, wanna hang out? I want you to be with me the whole night…

But that's not what I want.


4) What do you like about me?

*Long pause* I got nothing.


5) I want you to say that I am pretty/handsome and you like me sooooo much!

And I'd like Emma Watson, but we can't all get what we want, can we?


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If your enemy says:


1) Hi bitch!

*Keeps quiet until I realize he/she is looking at me* Oh, you were talking to me? Sorry, I thought you were talking to yourself again. Honest mistake.


2) You smell like shit!

I'd give a witty comeback, but you smell so bad that I just gotta leave now. *Goes away*


3) I know you hate me because I am much better than you!

Yes, you're right. No one else I know can be as dumb as you. Congratulations on actually beating me at something.


4) What an ugly creature you are!

Hey, just 'cause I don't look like a pig like you doesn't mean you should be insulting my looks!


5) I am going to kick your ass in this race for sure!

Okay, while you do that, I have a question. Do you want me to wait for you at the finish line?


Salut,

~Joshy~

P.S. Woah, three posts in a single day. That's gotta be some kinda record for me.

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Why "Flawed Perfection"?

I chose "Flawed Perfection" because nice ones such as "Honest Lies" and "Organized Chaos" were already chosen. In fact, Flawed Perfection was already chosen as well, but among all my ideas, this one was my favourite.

I like the reminder that everything is flawed perfectly.

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