Hot off the newspaper!

"News is only news if people care. Since all people care about is destruction, mayhem and death, what does that make us? Barbarians?"

I bet you didn't hear about this. I'm pretty sure that you didn't. How do I figure that? Well, it's about my friend's personal life, and he didn't seem to mind about me putting it in here (meaning, he didn't object), so here it will be put. For all time.

Or, until I decide to get rid of it. Which would be never.

Anyways, on to the story. My classmate, Aizat, and another classmate, Jennifer (not her real name), are apparently dating! Now, not only was that really shocking (Aizat is kinda... Well, the type of guy girls aren't into. Unless girls are into dark, gothic, depressed, dark-minded, dirty-minded and disfunctional weaklings. Which means I'll have to change my entire image. Dang.) but they actually call each other "husband and wife" online!

Well, now I finally have some ammunition against him. Wait until everybody in class reads about this... Which is why I'm depending on you, readers, to popularize my blog. Tell everyone! The world deserves to know! Ha ha, I'm like some sort of tabloid manager newspaper editor. Wait, not newspaper editor. It's closer to "Newspaper boy". You know, the one that's telling everyone what the news is.

I'm kinda worried about the two of them, though. Since they're already "husband and wife", (so to speak) they might decide to do third base. If you know what I mean. To be frank, that's kinda disgusting, doing it at 15 and all. Do people actually do third base at 15? Don't they have some sense of control?

Right, that's enough about the two lovebirds. I'll update as the news comes.

My friend Ming Yi is in a dilema. She's in love with this guy that's trying to choose between her and another girl. But, honestly, I don't see how hard it is to choose. He's in love (at least like, anyway) with Ming Yi, and it's only infatuation with this other girl that doesn't even know him. It's not that hard to choose, mate. Just go with the one you love, not the one you infatuate. Wow, that sounds weird, no?

We're receiving an update about the husband and wife thing!

Apparently, Aizat has more than one wife! Before I lecture him, I have to ask. How the heck is he the type of guy that attracts girls!? Now for the lecture. Aizat! How could you cheat on your wife?! That's despicable! It's low! It's crude! And it's amazing. (Hah, you weren't expecting that, were you?)

But seriously, though, Aizat, stick to one girl. If you're reading this, I'm telling it to you as a friend. If you have more than one wife, you'll just end up hurting all of them, and you'll probably be slapped a few times. Oh, and don't give me any nonsense about how "Life is too short for just one girl". If you're going to tell me that, you should never have gotten married in the first place!

That's all for now.

Till next time,

~Josh the Joshster~